15 Vintage Action Figures That Desecrate The IRL Stars

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15 Vintage Action Figures That Desecrate The IRL Stars

Action figures in the 21st century are practically a fine art, but that wasn’t always the case. Here are 15 movie tie-in toys that bear almost no resemblance to their famous real-life counterparts. 

THE MATRIX GRACKEDCOM KEANU REEVES AS NEO Any idea why Neo is wearing Harry Houdini's straightjacket?

STAR WARS CARRIE FISHER AS PRINCESS LEIA Princess Leia has one defining physical characteristic and it ain't windblown hair after a long bike ride.

RAMBO CRACKED:COM SYLVESTER STALLONE AS JOHN RAMBO We'll have to double-check our anatomy book, but what's with the freaky ring-toss muscles on Rambo'

RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK CRAGKED.COM HARRISON FORD AS INDIANA JONES Good thing Kenner had that big box of Action Figures Wearing Men's Dress Hats layin

PULP FICTION GRACKEDCOM UMA THURMAN AS MIA WALLACE Marcellus Wallace had someone's toy designing, hillbilly a killed, that's a hard motherfk ing fact.

HOOK CRACKED COM ROBIN WILLIAMS AS PETER PAN It's like the toy makers entered a look nothing like Robin Williams contest, and were gunning for first

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE CRACKED COM TOM CRUISE AS ETHAN HUNT They messed up Tom Cruise's face, but at least they got the height right.

KARATE KID GRACKED COM RALPH MACCHIO AS DANIEL LARUSSO Daniel, what happened to your face? And don't tell me it was another bike accident!

BACK TO THE FUTURE CRACKED COM MICHAEL J. FOX AS MARTY MCFLY No wonder Marty's mom never recognized him.

THE BIONIC WOMAN CRACKED.COM LINDSAY WAGNER AS JAIME SUMMERS This is what bionic eyes look like after a heavy dose of amphetamines.

JURASSIC PARK GRACKED COM P WAYNE KNIGHT AS DENNIS NEDRY Other than the sunglasses, hairstyle, bazooka, and action-hero body, this looks exactly like

GHOST RIDER CRACKED COM NICHOLAS CAGE AS JOHNNY BLAZE Nicholas Cage has had SO many faces, this action figure probably resembles one of them.

E.T. CRACKED COM HENRY THOMAS AS ELLIOTT This is what happened to Elliott after the government scientists got their hands on him.

CROCODILE DUNDEE CRACKED COM PAUL HOGAN AS CROCODILE DUNDEE Pretty sure Croc's head used to belong to another hero wearing a headband, but they painte

ALIEN GRACKED COM SIGOURNEY WEAVER AS RIPLEY OK, this one is just mean.

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