20 Ways American ‘Harry Potter’ Would Be a Totally Different Story

‘Semi-automatic wand’
20 Ways American ‘Harry Potter’ Would Be a Totally Different Story

When you think about it, there’s nothing inherently British about witchcraft and wizardry. If anything, you’d think the empire’s rebellious stepchildren would be more open to such things, rather famous witch trials notwithstanding.

Yet the wizarding world of Harry Potter is so British, it colonized this sentence as we were typing it. Sure, the Fantastic Beasts series introduced the concept of American magic schools, but there’s a reason we’ve largely stayed out of them. America doesn’t really do boarding school, nor train travel, nor Ye Olde Shoppes of any kind. American Harry Potter would just be really, really different.

That’s why one Reddit user asked r/AskReddit, “If Harry Potter was set in the United States, how would the story change?”

EnviousNinja 3y ago Semi automatic wand
sausagecatdude Зу ago Airport terminal 9 and 3 quarters
BE CURIOUS NOT JUDGMENTAL Honest_Joseph Зу ago Taco Tuesdays at the Great Hall
ZenosTrucker Зу ago Eagles instead of Owls. Sasquatch instead of Centaurs.
choodessny-droog Зу ago No one would have a British accent
 3y ago There would be a spell for wedgies. (Is that what they r called)
yaccamole Зу ago THE FLYING CAR WOULD BE EITHER A DODGE CHARGE OR A RAM 1500
Whatisthisrigamarule Зу ago Umbridge would have been named Karen.
 Зу ago Dudley would've been a Juggalo
Deafbones Зу ago Madame Pomfrey would charge out the arse for the Skele-Gro
iamjaidan Зу ago Aurors would have immunity from using unforgivable curses
 3y ago Azkaban would be at full capacity
Acceptable-Record267 Зу ago There would be an adventure (like the ones on Halloween and Christmas) on Thanksgiving
 3y ago Harry's gotta go around asking neighbors to buy random merchandise so he can play Quidditch each year
Jimmers1231 Зу ago This quidditch match is brought to you today on ESPN by Swiffer, the official broom of the Quidditch Cup.
King_Neptune07 Зу ago Quidditch coach is the highest paid professor at the school
 3y ago Seeing as the book is set during the early 90's, probably a few more mentions of what an incredible run Michael Jordan and the Bulls were having
lamtheonewhobawks Зу ago There would be a not-insignificant percentage of wizards who believe magic is a hoax by the Chinese to trick them into thinking sharing is a good idea.
Hamsternoir Зу ago Every time there's an injury at the school someone will be sued and the parents will get a very big bill even if it can be fixed with magic.
DodGamnBunofaSitch 3y ago they would change 'philosopher's stone' to 'sorcerer's stone'

Tags:

Scroll down for the next article
Forgot Password?