15 Fictional Games We'd Like to Nominate for the 2024 Olympics

“You forgot about the essence of the game.... It’s about the cones.”
15 Fictional Games We'd Like to Nominate for the 2024 Olympics

So, we just have to sit on our couches and watch our favorite characters play some new, exciting game they just made up?! No, thank you! Maybe some kids are satisfied watching world class gamers play video games on YouTube (for hours on end) instead of picking up a paddle and actually playing, but we’re no spectators. Pass the dutchie, you fictional game developers! 

There’s been so many good ones too. And now that we think of it, why do so many movies and TV shows create their own fictional games?! Are they dissatisfied with every real game on Earth, or was it a copyright infringement issue? Either way… Companies ‘round the world should be pining for the chance to produce a real world version of these games. Or better yet… The International Olympic Committee should deem them worthy of a worldwide competition. And because we know one or more of those committee members are reading this list, here are 13 fictional games that we’d like to nominate for the 2024 Olympics. Your move, IOC!

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Futuristic Laser Golf Baseball with Tarantulas? We’re in!

CRACKED FUTURAMA BLERNSBALL It's like classic baseball, but the ball is on an elastic tether that scores blerns if hit into a small hole. Batters hit multiple balls at once, then run bases on a motorcycle that explodes the bases. Oh, and a replacement pitcher rides to the mound on a giant tarantula.

Youtube

A real spectator sport. Perfect for the Olympics!

CRACKED Go letters to Cleo PARKS AND REC OUNSHIRE THE CONES OF DUNSHIRE Conceived by Ben Wyatt, it's like D&D for 8 to 12 players who play as fantasy characters like wizards, alchemists, and shamans. Players strategically build civilizations to earn four cones, and there's a billion convoluted rules we're sure the writers made up to parody D&D.

Youtube / Gamespot 

That Olympic stadium would get demolished! Let’s go!

CRACKED JUMANJI What's not to love? Each dice roll summons wild animals, monsoons, murderous vines, and a hunter until someone reaches the center and it all goes away. Oh, and you could get trapped in the jungle until someone rolls 5 or 8 (Like Robin Williams' character Alan did for 26 years).

Youtube / Hubpages 

Hear that, Olympics, there’s a physical challenge!

CRACKED IT'S ALWAYS SUNNY CHARDEE MACDENNIS The Game of Games has 3 stages. Mind involves trivia, puzzles, and artistry (and a ton of wine). Body involves a physical challenge, pain, and endurance (the beer level). Spirit involves emotional battery and public humiliation (the hard liquor level).

Youtube / IMDB 

The rules are never truly explained but they look like they’re having a blast!

CRACKED FRIENDS BAMBOOZLED Joey auditions for the host of this game show. Contestants answer questions while holding their breath, hopping on one foot, or repeating the answers backwards. There's a Wheel of Mayhem, a hungry monkey, a super speedy speed round, and Google cards.

Youtube

There’s just a lot going on here. Maybe the real Olympics can help organize it.

CRACKED data OR I I - - CUSTOMER CFR - MARKINGS NAMER ٢٢١ Bow TAPLE 53 THE OFFICE OLYMPICS AKA THE DUNDER MIFFLIN OLYMPIAD Warehouse workers race forklifts and office workers throw random things into coffee mugs. Events include paper football (AKA Hate Ball), Dunderball, Flonkerton and stuffing the most M&Ms in their mouths. They compete for gold, silver, and blue yogurt lids.

Youtube / Bustle 

Marshall thinks Backgammon sucks, but the name is good enough.

CRACKED SALE BMN HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER MARSHGAMMON It combines Candyland, I Never, and Pictionary, and only Backgammon in name (because as Marshall says, Backgammon sucks). If a player rolls an even number when adjacent to the peppermint forest, they Marshall Out, and yes alcohol is involved.

Fandom / Youtube 

The nerds got a hold of a classic.

CRACKED THE BIG BANG THEORY ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS, LIZARD, SPOCK Obviously like Rock, Paper, Scissors, but Rock crushes Lizard, Lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes Scissors, Scissors decapitates Lizard, Lizard eats Paper, Paper disproves Spock, and Spock vaporizes Rock.

Youtube

The rules are pretty self-explanatory.

CRACKED THE THAT ZA YO REN & STIMPY DON'T WHIZ ON THE ELECTRIC FENCE In Svën Höek, Ren and his cousin Svën play their favorite game. It's similar to Mouse Trap, but instead of a mouse-catching device, an electric fence plugs into an outlet, and you clearly shouldn't whiz on it.

Fandom

It’d be pretty sweet if the Olympics just made up a game’s rules on the spot.

CRACKED M*A*S*H DOUBLE CRANKO It's a mashup of chess, poker, checkers, and gin rummy (with a hammer for some reason) where bishops are worth 3 jacks and checkers are wild. The rules are made up on the spot as an excuse to drink and win money, so yeah, sign us up.

Youtube

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