Cracked Archive - Weird World


If People Actually Said What They Really Mean

if the subtext of everything you said appeared neatly translated in the moment you said it. White lies would disappear overnight, sexual innuendo would never go unnoticed, and you would actually be able to use sarcasm around your parents, Germans and people from the deep south.


The Top 25 Cracked Articles of 2012

The views have been tallied. The critics have been ignored. Nothing but the hits: The 25 most crazy popular articles we put up this year.


The Top 15 Cracked Videos of 2012

They made you laugh, they made you cry, they made you think. Or made you do none of those things at all.


10 Christmas Decorations That Will Haunt Your Dreams

The following Christmas decorations are a testament to the fact that even psychopaths and serial killers apparently make time between pulling the legs off insects and fashioning skin suits to celebrate the holidays.


The 17 Worst Christmas Specials Possible

We asked our readers to show us what would happen if entertainers just said,


9 Disturbing Christmas Ads You Won't Believe Are Real

Here are some old-school holiday ads that make us wonder what the hell the past was thinking.


The 6 Most Needlessly Overcomplicated Crimes Ever Planned

It seems that real crooks have taken a page or two from the likes of the Riddler and Lex Luthor and started planning their crimes in the most elaborate, pointlessly complicated ways possible.


23 Staggering (True) Facts About Money

Beyond 'a penny saved is a dollar earned,' we don't get much money advice for the first decade of our education, and we're pretty sure the math doesn't even work out on that one.


A Letter to My Neighbors About My Dubstep Lightshow

First of all, happy holidays! I hope this letter finds you and your families well during the season of good cheer.


5 Ways to Actually Steal Christmas

Like a lot of you, I am basically a monster, and as is the case every year, this holiday season has filled me with bile.


6 Harsh Truths That Will Make You a Better Person

You're going to hate hearing this. My only defense is that this is what I wish somebody had said to me around 1995 or so.


If Holiday Cards Were Allowed to Kick Ass

We asked our readers to show us what some holiday cards would look like from folks who needed custom pants to fit their over-sized jingle bells.


5 Dirty Jokes in Modern Movies (That Are Older Than Film)

Here are five types of jokes that you'd expect to see in an American Pie movie that are actually much, much older than that.