Most of them are embarrassing, shameful and possibly even incriminating but he does it all without a hint of judgment because Uncle Frank knows, perhaps better than anyone, that the depth of human ignorance can never be overestimated.
Some of what passed for everyday life 75 or 100 years ago would send you running screaming in the other direction today. And when those scenes are captured on grainy old-school film, you get the stuff of nightmares.
Even the best Hollywood set dressers in the biggest budget horror movie can't outdo real life. You wouldn't spend a night in in these places regardless of the number of shotguns and Bibles you were allowed to bring.
There are some places where the true spirit of Halloween lives on in grand fashion.
There are a handful of good excuses for not going to work: illness, death in the family and actually that's just about it. When I'm king, all these listed will be acceptable.
A few years ago, Cracked.com sent me to the San Diego Comic-Con. Hopefully Comikaze will be much different.
Sorry, single people, this week's column is for lovers only. Now that those lonely people are gone, hold that lover close and enjoy 50 highlights from three romantic books that offer tips for every day of the year.
We've shown you some pretty bad costumes before. Some of you didn't get the message: Just because your costume wasn't on THAT list doesn't mean you can still dress like an ass and get away with it.
These people need to find, and then kill, their realtors.
First off, congratulations on becoming a homeowner! Deciding to buy a house is one of the most important decisions you will ever make and it should feel good knowing that those four walls belong to you now, regardless of what shape they're in and on which Indian burial ground they might be standing.
Halloween's nearly here, and that means Cracked is once again out to prove that the tales that scared you shitless as a kid could actually kill you as an adult.
If you were lucid in the late 80s and early 90s, you know that most of our information was given to us by way of rap. It's how we learned everything from bike safety to the proper way of making love to police officers. However, there were many other teaching methods that were just as deranged.