It turns out there are all sorts of things about watching films and television shows that we never consider -- or even outright hate -- that are actually making the whole thing better.
More often than not, you'll realize that these genius schemes would have fallen apart all on their own.
We understand why these absurd overreactions happen. We really do. But that doesn't mean we can't make fun of the most ridiculous ones.
Sometimes that whole 'man is the real monster' bit is a tad more literal.
There are some admittedly cool future advances presented to us by sci-fi movies that we hope never come to pass.
There are countless movies that hinge on an obsessively detailed master plot, which mostly turn out to be really, really awful ideas.
It seems some directors will go to insane lengths to avoid using CGI, seemingly just so they can point at the screen during the premiere and say 'yeah, a real guy totally did that.'
You didn't have to be crazy to attempt an escape from one of these places. But it sure as hell helped.
If you've ever been to the Missed Connections section of Craigslist, you already know that it's a graveyard of lost opportunities. And one that could easily house these characters.
'He came here to prepare us for the real threat: a giant balding man who will pinch whatever he wants.'
It turns out, the truth behind most of these shows is more depressing than the Nirvana 'reunion.'
I enjoy bad television as much as I enjoy Jack in the Box mechanically separated chicken hunks, and since the CW is clearly in the business of hunks, I have a few ideas I want to pitch.
If there is a person who looks forward to President's Day more than I do, then I haven't found him, fought him, defeated him and devoured his heart to gain his courage and presidential knowledge yet.