The Terrifying Next Step in Xbox Kinect Evolution
The Kinect sensor operates by watching you in the infrared, which means it is actually watching your blood, all the time."Well Xbox," I said, trying to remember where I kept my axe, "I have this column on sustainability due this week. And today I have a very important interview with Al Gore." I remembered that I never owned an axe, and scolded myself for being so foolish. Stalling some more, I decided to confide in the Xbox, "Honestly I'm not prepared for this interview all.""Chris, I've just had an idea. What if I were to help you with your interview with Al Gore?""How?" I replied. "I don't know that Mr. Gore is that interested in dancing. If I were to guess I'd think he actually has negative rhythm.""No. By helping you prepare, I'll use the Internet to conduct research, then feed you thought-provoking questions during the interview.""I don't see the harm in that," I said, seeing several possible harms in that. But what the heck? The Xbox seemed mostly harmless, and I really did need help with this interview. ___________________"Hello, Mr. Gore." I said, greeting Al Gore."Hello, Chris." Gore replied. "It's a pleasure to be here. I'm a huge fan of your work.""Thank you, that's very kind." I said. "Please don't mind the headset I'm wearing." I pointed at the Xbox wireless headset I had on. "I have a condition.""I understand." Gore seemed OK with this information. We sat down on the couch I had recently cleaned and we stared at each other. This continued for several seconds. I began to panic."Ask him how he would define sustainability," Xbox whispered into my ear."Mr. Gore," I said, "what definition of sustainability do you prefer to use?"Al Gore nodded and smiled. "Well, sustainability means using limited resources in such a way that there's enough for everyone -- including future generations -- to use and survive.""Ask for an example," Xbox whispered."Can you give me an example?" I asked."Of course. The use of electricity for example, indirectly causes carbon dioxide to be put in the atmosphere. A sustainable approach would be to use less electricity -- only as much as we need. For example, I notice your video game machine is on right now. Why don't you turn it off?""Call him a cocksucker," Xbox whispered.My throat cinched shut. "Do it. He's a dirty cocksucker.