The 7 Best Kinds of Monkeys: A Drunk Column
Even though the entire United States is celebrating its independence this long weekend with drinking and showering loved ones in fire, Editor-in-Chief Jack O'Brien is still insisting that I write a column. He would rather I cook up genius alone in a dark room than love my country with beer and explosions because Jack O'Brien hates fun, and he hates America.
Capuchin Monkeys
Pygmy Marmosets
Spectacled Langur*
Golden Snub-Nosed Monkey
Emperor Tamarin
This One!
Koala Bear
For more from Soren, check out The Most Appropriately Endangered Species on the Planet and 5 Ham-Fisted Religious Websites.