Cracked Science Corner!!!!11!!
A comet that has delighted backyard astronomers in recent weeks after an unexpected eruption has now grown larger than the sun. ... "It continues to expand and is now the largest single object in the solar system," according to astronomers at the University of Hawaii.It's natural at this point to ask, "Should I be freaking the fuck out?" Well, you came to the right place, my friend, because I am the one person who will give you the answer straight up:
Lisi's inspiration lies in the most elegant and intricate shape known to mathematics, called E8---a complex, eight-dimensional mathematical pattern with 248 points that, if written out in tiny print, would cover an area the size of Manhattan.... E8 encapsulates the symmetries of a geometric object that is 57-dimensional and is itself is 248-dimensional. Lisi says "I think our universe is this beautiful shape."... which he may have followed up with, "also, Dude, have you ever really thought about the word 'elbow'? What an awesome word. Elbow.
"Mass Effect," a futuristic space adventure, has been banned because of "lesbian intimacy," deputy director of the Board of Film Censors said in a statement. ... The human-alien duo are depicted kissing and caressing each other in a sex scene that a newspaper reported ends with the alien saying, "By the gods, that was incredible, commander."Someday, the paranoid despots of the world will realize that you can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs, and you can't make a global science superpower without allowing a few alien lesbian sex scenes. The two will always go hand in hand, like peanut butter and jelly, or Communism and bad haircuts, or Derek Jeter and herpes. That's all for this installment of Cracked Science Corner!!!!11!! Until next time, don't forget that for an extra $20, a hooker will be happy to yell, "By the gods, that was incredible, commander!"---even for you.