With just three days until the commencement of the Tokyo games on Friday, it seems yet another professional contest is well underway in the world of sports – the Petty Olympics. Yep, on Monday, The European Handball Federation truly went for the gold in this lesser-known competition, slapping each member of the Norwegian women's beach handball team with a hefty fine for committing what they say is a dastardly violation of the sport's rules – daring to wear thigh-long shorts as opposed to skimpy bikini bottoms while competing in the European Beach Handball Championships earlier this month. 

Although the team said the Federation-approved bottoms made them feel “unnecessarily sexualized and uncomfortable” in competition, according to Newsweek, it seems this complaint had approximatetly zero impact on officials, who hit the team with 1,500 euro fine, which equates to 150 euro per player. 

"The Disciplinary Commission at the Beach Handball EURO 2021 has dealt with a case of improper clothing. In the bronze medal game against Spain on Sunday the team of Norway played with shorts that are not according to the Athlete Uniform Regulations defined in the IHF Beach Handball Rules of the Game," the Federation said in a statement, per The Hill

In a rule that has an absolutely 0 percent chance of existing due to any form of consideration for the male gaze, the International Handball Federation mandates players sport tight tops and teeny bottoms while playing. 

“Women should wear a bikini where the top should be a tight-fitting sports bra with deep openings at the arms. The bottom must not be more than ten centimeters on the sides,” the guidelines read. 

Players on the men's team, however, have a bit more leeway when it comes to whether or not they want to bear it all on the court, with the rules mandating players must wear "tight-fitting tank tops" paired with "not too baggy" shorts that sit "10 centimeters above the kneecap."

For more internet nonsense, follow Carly on Instagram @HuntressThompson_ on TikTok as @HuntressThompson_, and on Twitter @TennesAnyone.

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