Going To See The New Russell Crowe Movie In Theaters Isn't Remotely Badass
With theater chains opening across the country, this past weekend's U.S. box office was topped, not by a decades-old Steven Spielberg movie playing the drive-in circuit, but an actual new movie. Making a whopping $4 million was the new Russell Crowe film about a deranged, violent madman prone to irrational bursts of anger targeting random people. We double-checked, apparently, it's called Unhinged, not The Russell Crowe Story.
Unhinged is only available in theaters -- meaning that if you want to watch a sweaty, old Russell Crowe terrorizing women at home, sorry you'll just have to settle for the ability to watch nearly every other movie ever made over the past hundred years instead. Since some people might be a tad reluctant to head out to the cinema right now, the folks over at the Unhinged publicity department have come up with a way to make risking your health amid a global pandemic ... fun?
The official Unhinged Twitter account is rewarding fans with "badges" to show-off what badass rebels they are, implying that sitting motionless in a comfy chair eating popcorn is somehow an extreme feat of strength. After all, if you saw Unhinged in a movie theater, that's basically like bungee-jumping from a burning building while smoking whatever drugs are cool right now. Even Crowe himself encouraged followers to "earn" badges by seeing Unhinged in theaters.
Okay, first of all, bragging about going to see the new Russell Crowe thriller is a little like bragging about eating Arby's in a truck stop parking lot -- yes, that's technically a thing you did, but it's probably because your choices were severely limited. Second of all, these "badges" aren't much of a reward, they're literally just JPEGs. The studio couldn't even spring for some T-shirts or beer koozies? Lastly, attempting to dare people into going to the movies right now, something infectious disease experts have strongly warned against, is, at best pathetic, and at worst, grossly irresponsible. Even Christopher Nolan hasn't resorted to this bullshit ... yet.
Top Image: Solstice Studios