NASA Recently Sent A Bunch of Human Spooge To The International Space Station
NASA has been conducting a scientific study called Micro-11, whose experimental method involves the unique step of shooting sperm into space. By rocket, not some titanic orgasm, if you're wondering. And this is completely ... reasonable? Compared to some of the other things on this list, sperm is one of the more sensible things we've put into space. For one, we've got so much of it down here on Earth which we waste every day, and two, they're doing some good with it up in space. No, not filming clips for Pornhub, that's awful. Science. They're doing science. So not insane at all.
Still, it's space sperm. The government will shut us down if we don't talk about space sperm, so let's get into it.
vchalup/Adobe StockFrom wombs to moons.
So why do we need space sperm? Well, if we ever want a colony of people in space, the ability of sperm to perform in microgravity will be relevant. Similar deal if we ever hope to put a permanent settlement on Mars or the moon. And there's reason to suspect the spermies will have trouble in this environment. Previous research with animal sperm has shown that it doesn't quite behave in microgravity as it should. And even if we never want to make space babies, studying sperm in microgravity might reveal things we can't see on Earth -- information that might be useful for improving old-fashioned terrestrial fertilization, as the kids call it these days.
The tests involve nothing gross -- just microscopes, chemicals, and presumably very well-sealed containers. No word on how the samples were collected, whether NASA raided a sperm bank or ran some kind of in-house raffle or something. However it came off (heh), we can only hope that it happened at great expense to the taxpayers.
We Sent Andy Warhol's Dick Pic to the Moon
While we're on the subject of private parts (although we're rarely far from it), let's discuss the dick pic we've placed on the moon. You see, when the Apollo missions finished their work on the moon and left, they didn't take everything with them. A large portion of the lander module got left behind each time, and given the relaxed parking restrictions on the moon, they're all still there.