Listen: You're a filthmonger, and it's a problem. It is affecting your life and the lives of those around you. But there is one disgusting thing that you may be doing right: those unwashed blue jeans. A student named Josh Le at the University of Alberta conducted a study with his textiles professor on a pair of "raw denim" jeans he'd bought. Josh wore the same pair every day for 15 months, even creating a time-lapse video of how the jeans looked when allowed to distress naturally:
Josh wore those jeans everywhere from freezing Canada to sunny California. If he accidentally spilled food on them, he cleaned it up with paper towels. If there was a bit of a stench beginning to build up, he'd fold the jeans and put them in a freezer overnight to get rid of it. But in no circumstance would he actually wash those suckers.
After 15 months, Josh and his professor measured the amount of bacteria on the jeans, and then washed them. He wore them for another 13 days, and checked the bacteria again. He found that there wasn't much difference between 15 months' and 13 days' worth of bacteria.
This isn't new information. Jeans manufacturer Levi Strauss actually advocates washing your jeans no more than once a month, if only to help with water conservation. So if you're looking for ways to be a better person that require literally zero effort, just continue never washing your jeans. Great job, literally everyone in their 20s!
Wash everything else, though. With detergent.
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