5 Totally Crazy Film Genres You Had No Clue Existed

5

Osterns And Red Westerns Were Soviet Versions Of American Westerns

American Westerns were extremely popular in the Soviet Union, but there was a problem with that: the West. So they invented their own cowboy genre, which was about how great communism was and how much capitalism totally sucked. Many were much more progressive than their American counterparts -- often portraying Native Americans as the heroes, for instance.

Most of these movies fell into two categories: Red Westerns, wherein Russians would somehow end up in the American West, and Osterns (Easterns), which had similar themes to American Westerns, but were set in the Eurasian steppes. In contrast to American Westerns and their focus on rugged individualism on the supposed frontier of civilization, Red Westerns depicted the "Wild West" as a struggle between oppressed Natives and evil imperialist Americans. In the East German film The Sons Of Great Bear, money-grubbing white people try to steal Native land so they can mine for gold. Obviously they're defeated, because the Natives are anti-capitalist and therefore more pure. Also, they can control bears, a useful asset.

Bosna Film

Romania's The Oil, The Baby And The Transylvanians follows a group of Transylvanian brothers who move to the American West. Naturally, they're forced into ideological struggles, often tempted by "riches" when they should be sticking to their pure, hardworking values. In one scene, evil bandits attack and ... try to buy their land. They're not trying to steal or kill; they only want to pay them money for their farm. Just like an evil capitalist would.

Romaniafilm"Looks like you got a nice piece of land here. It'd be a shame if someone were to ...pay for it."

Sadly, the genre died alongside the Soviet Union, because Russia and the United States now get along swimmingly and have no disagreements to speak of.

4

Mexico Made Hundreds Of Superhero Movies Starring Luchadores

You've heard the saying "Not all heroes wear capes." The Mexican film industry took that idiom one step further in the '50s, '60s, and '70s. Their heroes didn't even wear shirts.

Estudios AmericaGotta wear gloves, though. Wouldn't want to be unsanitary.

3

White People Playing Native Americans Killing White People

America has a long and terrible history of exploiting Native Americans, and Hollywood is no exception. Once early plots evolved beyond "Hey, here's a horse," Native Americans quickly became the savage villains in Hollywood Westerns. Eventually, movies turned a more sympathetic eye toward them, but there was a weird period in between during which filmmakers didn't know what to do. They'd overworked the "Natives as evil" angle, but directors still couldn't imagine one working at a restaurant or shopping at Whole Foods, what with all their mandatory war paint and ornamental headdresses. That confusion birthed Redsploitation.

A typical Redsploitation film begins with a Native American protagonist being abused by whitey, and ends with our hero scalping and tomahawking those assholes in the most stomach-churning ways possible. Think Inglorious Basterds, but without all the subtlety. Of course, all of our Native heroes were portrayed by white people, in case you were worried Hollywood did something right.

In the not-quite-classic Thunder Warrior trilogy, for example, Thunder returns home from a long absence, only to discover construction workers tearing up his ancestral burial grounds so they can build an ... observatory? You know those damnable astronomers and their cultural insensitivity. Thunder initially tries to defuse the situation with words, but the construction workers laugh him off and beat him up a bit, 'cause whitey gotta white. So Thunder breaks into a store, walks right past the guns, and grabs a big-ass crossbow, 'cause Natives gotta Native. Thunder subsequently murders everyone in town for three straight movies, like Rambo with better hair.

2

Italian Mondo "Documentaries" Were All About Insane Shock Value

Back in the '60s, Italian filmmakers grew tired of making "safe" movies starring bicycle thieves and pasta-loving cowboys. So they traveled the globe, documenting foreign cultures and their freaky habits to create "shockumentaries." These films depicted taboo subjects like sex and death, and would often go to great lengths to horrify audiences. The film that inspired the whole practice, Mondo Cane, featured dogs getting skinned alive, bulls being beheaded, men being hunted, and about a bazillion nipples. And the ante only upped from there.

Filmmakers soon realized that real people, even people who live in a jungle and don't always wear pants, aren't all that different from everyone else. So they started staging crazier sequences to make their movies more titillating. You might notice this as the exact opposite of the point of a documentary, but nobody at the time did. Africa Addio (delicately translated in English to Africa: Blood And Guts) documented the end of colonialism in Africa, and its marketing campaign claimed they actually killed a Congolese Simba rebel on camera. This obviously prompted police to seize footage and arrest the director, who was only released after he proved that his crew had shown up right before the man's execution and hadn't planned it themselves. Which was ... totally OK, somehow?

CinerizMerely being asked to prove you weren't responsible for an execution is a good sign you've made bad choices in life.

1

Ugandan Action Films Are The Most Ridiculously Violent Things Ever

For decades, Uganda was ruled by the vicious Idi Amin, and according to Ugandan director Isaac Nabwana, "Being that Idi Amin killed people, we have also to kill people to rub that off that ... bad image." There's no time to determine whether or not that makes sense, because we've got explosions to see!

WakaliwoodLike American Rambo, except he apologizes after blowing your head off.

The developing "Wakaliwood" film industry gained some infamy in the wake of Nabwana's ludicrous viral hit Who Killed Captain Alex?, and that was only the start. In Tebaatusasula: Ebola, self-proclaimed "Ebola hunters" try to stomp out Ebola in the developing world by shooting and kicking everything to death.

Ramon Film ProductionsThe safest place to leave your highly explosive gas tank is right in front of your dick.