Mark Zuckerberg And Jack Dorsey Like To Take Their Workers On Surreal Field Trips
Typically, interactions with your boss' boss tend to involve you getting run over by their driver on the way to the bus stop. But some CEOs are more interested in their underlings than others. Ironically, in the tech world, it's the titans of social media who place a lot of importance on having some face-to-face time with all of their employees. And leave it to guys like Mark Zuckerberg and Jack Dorsey to find a way to tell someone "You and I are going on a little trip" and make the outcome somehow worse than being murdered in a motel bathtub.
For Facebook employees, Zuckerberg's reign of awkward terror begins even before they get their first paycheck. Potential Facebook recruits are sent a weird email telling them they're wanted by the company. After arriving at Facebook HQ, they're quickly shuttled to a private room, forced to sign a bunch of NDAs, and then poof, Zuckerberg appears. He then takes these headhuntees on a walk up in the woods around Palo Alto, where tells them its history of tech and innovation before he stresses how badly he wants their talent all up in his company. One such recruit described it as "surreal," and like he "was on a date" -- two interviewing techniques that are a surefire way of giving your HR department stomach ulcers.
that movie about how big a creep I am? Anyway, let’s go into the woods alone!”" width="350" height="237" class="lazy" data-src="https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/3/4/4/650344_v2.jpg" />Justin Sullivan/Getty Images“Hey, did you see that movie about how big a creep I am? Anyway, let’s go into the woods alone!”
At least the CEO of Twitter and enabler of dangerously mouthy world leaders Jack Dorsey waits until you're in the door to unleash weird expeditions on his workforce. In his other company, Square, Dorsey rounds up all the new employees every Friday and drives them like cattle down to the statue of Gandhi outside San Francisco's Ferry Building. Then, like a low-rent Aristotle, he walks them through all of San Francisco's most important districts while he explains his "Four Corners of Square" philosophy. Both he and Zuckerberg keep these practices hidden from anyone not working for them. If you're only comfortable talking honestly to people who've signed an NDA, you might be a crazed tech billionaire.
Shigeru Miyamoto Is Really Into Measuring Stuff
For middle-aged men, hobbies are a great distraction from constantly recalling all the promotions they didn't get. Popular ways to keep the murderous rage at bay include repairing vintage cars, crying in sheds, and woodworking. But for Nintendo CEO and manic pixie old man Shigeru Miyamoto, it's measuring stuff.
What Miyamoto, a genius games developer, finds the most fun ever is predicting the lengths and weights of stuff, then measuring it to see how close he got. The man carries a tape measure everywhere. "For instance, I might guess that the table in front of us is about 1.2 metres long," he told Nintendo.com. "Then I'd actually measure it with the measuring tape to check. If I got it right, I'd think: 'I'm on form today!' But if I missed the mark by a long way, I'd think: 'I've been slipping a bit recently!'"
Kevork Djansezian/Getty ImagesYup, the guy who created Mario no longer lives in the same zip code as fun. That may be the most tragic thing we’ve ever heard.