If you ever get the chance to become a celebrity, you should know that it involves a certain amount of talking yourself up. Unseemly as it might be, this does serve a purpose, in that it tends to make you more famous, or at least more infamous, or at least more money. Invariably, many of these boasts involve how many people you've boned, what other famous people you've boned, and under what ridiculous circumstances the boning occurred. And sure, this is often to the detriment of things like "the truth" and "modesty," but that's OK, right? Who's going to care when so many bigger things are going on in the world?
We care. Because while some of these sexual claims may seem far-fetched but plausible, others are the equivalent of that kid in school who swore up and down he had a girlfriend, but she goes to a different school, you probably don't know her.
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Alex Jones Says He Banged 150 Women Before Age 16
There's no polite way to say this -- and honestly, why try? -- but Alex Jones is a foul, conspiracy-peddling ghoul. That's if you take everything he says seriously; for legal reasons, he may in fact be a satirist, in which case he's ... an awful satirist.
InfoWars
In addition to just plain awful.
Anyways, keep that in mind as we poke into an anecdote he related about how he used to be a cougar-hunting teen lothario:
"When I was 16, I didn't want to party any more. I didn't want to play games any more. I grew up. I'd already been in the fights, all the big rituals. I'd already had probably -- I hate to brag, but I'm not bragging, it's actually shameful -- probably 150 women, or more, that's conservative ... I was already dating college girls by the time I was 15 years old. I was already a man at 16."
Gee, Alex. We're surprised it's taken you so long to mention this, considering it reveals there's a secret statutory rape cult taking over the country. 150 -- which, remember, is the bare minimum he's claiming -- is a huge number of sexual conquests for an entire lifetime, let alone a 16-year-old. And that is a hot garbage number if many of those are supposedly grown-ass women. How hot could one teen be?
Alex Jones
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