And that rugged-looking lady? It's legendary leading-man Burt Lancaster!
"Hey, it's the opening credits narrator from COPS!"
And while his costume wasn't as elaborate, Kirk "Spartacus" Douglas was rendered completely unrecognizable simply by covering up his glorious chin hole:
It took five truckloads of latex to fill it.
You Definitely Saw Glenn Close As A Pirate In Hook
Glenn Close played a male pirate in Hook -- if you already know this, we're guessing it's because you enjoy reading movie trivia, and not because you heard a theater full of children exclaim "Hey, that's that star of Fatal Attraction!" Close is pretty damn unrecognizable as the pirate who gets thrown in the scorpion-filled "boo box" by Dustin Hoffman's Captain Hook (who we're obligated to remind you was lovers with Bob Hoskins' Smee).
"This is what you get for choosing the boy and not the girl!" "But that was Meryl Str-"
According to Close, she was just visiting the set with her daughter because they were friends with Robin Williams. Then out of nowhere, Steven Spielberg approached her and asked: "Do you want to be a pirate?" There's only one correct answer to that question. The transformation was so convincing even the script supervisor thought she was a dude.
She even got an Oscar nomination for this, albeit 20 years after the fact.
In stark contrast to randomly soliciting Academy Award-nominated actresses, the rest of the pirates were recruited from local biker bars (fake beards don't grow on trees, you know). The pirate-bikers grew resentful of the set's Hollywood hierarchy, getting only pretzels and water to snack on, which -- not to besmirch a cherished children's classic -- sounds like the opening scenes of a way better movie.
JM is now on Twitter, and co-hosts the podcast Rewatchability.
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