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Five Out Of Six Movie Deaths Are Now Caused By Huge Blue Light Beams
There are an infinite number of ways for aliens to kill us. They can drop asteroids on us, grow replacements of us in pods, or carefully wait for every Earth government to elect an insecure idiot with nuclear capabilities. But somewhere along the way, all movie aliens agreed on a single method: a big stupid beam of blue light.
Marvel Studios Shown here, all big and stupid and blue.
In the '90s, beams of blue light came out of every alien ship and death satellite, but it wasn't until the rise of the superhero movie that blue light beams became the deadliest killer in all of cinema. Beams of blue light are practically the main character in most Marvel movies. Here's Iron Man waving to one:
Marvel Studios "Stay in touch!" he told the beam of blue light during the wrap party. "SKSHH-FWOMMMMM!" it replied.
To differentiate themselves from the Marvel movies, the DC superhero films decided to be shitty piles of unlikeable misery. However, they did end up using the same blue light beams. In Man Of Steel, all of Metropolis not smashed into rubble by Superman himself is vaporized by a giant blue beam.
Warner Bros. Well, blueish. You have to turn the saturation on your TV way, way up to see colors during a DC movie.
No matter how many cool weapons the bad guys came up with, they kept coming back to the blue beams. They even showed up in Transformers: Dark Of The Moon. Think about that for a minute: It's a movie about robots that turn into fighter jets, Laserbeaks, and dinosaurs, and some asshole still suggested, "What if we blew everything up with just, like, some big blue beam?"
Paramount Pictures Pictured: Not dinosaur robots or Laserbeaks.
Suicide Squad is a movie featuring 416 potentially interesting characters and one Jared Leto's Joker, and even that monstrosity manages to squeeze in three giant blue beams.
Warner Bros. They happened in Act Two, the seventh Act Three, and the 14th denouement.
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