u up? wot r u wearin? also, need regulatory impact memo revised and on my desk by tmrw morning
That same deal is going to happen with the arrival of self-driving cars. An hour of sitting around with nothing to do? Tell us your manager won't start giving you some tasks to work on for the ride home. Heck, tell us you won't start volunteering to do it yourself. That expectation of being available around the clock is a two-way street, soon to be navigated by self-driving cars that allow us to be even more available.
We are our own worst enemies.
Oh, and speaking of things that will happen a lot more in cars ...
People Are Absolutely Going To Have Sex In Them, All The Time
Ok, so imagine you and your date/special someone/Craigslist respondent are riding around in a fantastic future machine that can pilot itself. You don't have to pay any attention to it, it won't give you any weird looks, and it doesn't require any kind of conversation. It's happy to just drive wherever you tell it to drive, completely oblivious to whatever you and your fellow passenger are doing.
"Car, take us to pound town."
There has never been a finer recipe for boning. Hell, it would be weird not to have sex in a self-driving car, especially on long road trips. Which means the highways, byways, and thoroughfares of the nation, at any given time of day, are going to be loaded with foggy sex pods. It varies from state to state, but as of now, having sex in a car is considered sex in public, which is a misdemeanor. But all of those laws assume that you're parked in a neighborhood or rest stop or something. That might all change when the car is in motion, being steered by an unfeeling automaton that is literally impossible to distract (see "things are sometimes legal only because they aren't explicitly illegal," above). There'll be like a 40% chance you're going to see someone's taint every time you drive to Piggly Wiggly.
Also, think of all the additional effects this could have on things previously unrelated to driving. Tinder will add a carpooling tab. The airline industry will suffer (it's still way difficult to have sex in a plane, and way cheaper to have your robot butler drive you home for the holidays). The DOT traffic camera websites will become subscription based. And the traffic report would suddenly become the most popular local news segment in history, because there is zero chance people wouldn't fuck their way through a gridlock on the 405.
Wear your condoms and seatbelts everyone.
Isaac has an adorable puppy who loves car rides on his Instagram and Twitter.
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