Look, we get it. While you're busy packing your bags for that shuttle to Mars, news happens. And no reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every headline while maintaining their sanity, so we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).

Disney is developing a live-action version of The Lion King

The father of Ahmed Mohamed is suing multiple news outlets for defamation

Google has introduced Google Station to provide worldwide free wifi

Woman carrying jars of her husband's entrails tries to board plane

MacGruber 2 is in the works

Commuter train wreck in Hoboken

Disney might buy Twitter

Measles has been eliminated in the Americas

Congress overrides Obama veto, then realizes the law could cause problems

Adventure Time will end after this season

Trump tweeted a 3 AM rant against Alicia Machado

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