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You Could Develop A Breathing Problem That Causes You To Die If You Fall Asleep

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You know you're screwed when the word "curse" appears in the name of your disease. Such is the case for those who suffer from Ondine's Curse, a disorder that short-circuits the part of your brain responsible for breathing, which we're sure you'll agree is one of the more important parts.

Once afflicted, patients "forget" how to breathe automatically and consequently are forced to consciously inhale oxygen into their lungs. That alone is exhausting and terrible, but that's not the worst part -- Ondine's Curse becomes a life-threatening problem when patients fall asleep and just stop breathing altogether.

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The curse, otherwise known as congenital central hypoventilation syndrome, is essentially a form of sleep apnea on steroids (if you take your steroids with just an unsightly amount of booze).

Because there is no cure, the only way to survive a night with Ondine's Curse is to stuff a breathing tube up a hole carved into your throat and hope for the best. No one is entirely sure how or why the disease starts. Although the name would logically point to defiling some kind of sacred temple, most cases are congenital, meaning that patients are born with it. However, there have been many instances where adults have developed the disease out of nowhere or after an accident or infection. Some evidence even suggests that chronic alcoholism may be a potential cause, while other research says that the condition can also be triggered by sleeping pills.

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You Could Start To Hear Your Insides Moving

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Some people, it turns out, have thin ear bones (which is admittedly piggybacking on the equally thunderous "There are such things as ear bones" revelation). Technically called temporal bones, they are basically protective helmets for the inner parts of the human ear, and if you were born with one anorexic enough to become too thin or even develop small holes, you could end up with superior canal dehiscence syndrome, which is a fancy way of saying that you might hear the insides of your body moving.

And we mean everything. Your heartbeat, your blood flowing through your veins, even your eyes moving around in your skull -- once you come down with SCDS, you'll be able to hear them all day every day, thus gaining a hell of a lot of respect for what Daredevil goes through. You know, except for the whole "not being able to see" thing. That's a whole separate condition, called "blindness."

Marvel Television

Early symptoms of SCDS include general dizziness and a tendency to fall down and/or feel physically ill at the sound of certain noises. Then the real horror begins. Maybe at first it's an oscillating squeak, like a finger rubbing against a wet porcelain plate, that won't go away. Or perhaps a deafening roar, like a perpetually crashing wave that you hear every time you eat. Then, you slowly start to realize that it's the internal functions of your body that's making all those noises, including the "sandpaper on wood" sound apparently given off by our moving eyeballs.

Vestibular Disorders Association

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Your Bones Could Just Start To Disappear One Day

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We don't want to spook you out, but there is a skeleton living inside you right now. Still, though, you know what's even spookier? Not having a skeleton inside you. That's a reality for people who have Gorham-Stout disease, aka idiopathic massive osteolysis, aka disappearing bone disease, aka noodle body syndrome, aka dem bones disease (not all of those names are officially recognized by the medical community).

via Hindawi.com

To put it simply, people who contract the disease lose the ability to grow new bones. In a normal person, when a bone is fractured or otherwise injured, it usually re-ossifies, kind of like how skin heals over a cut or expands with a growing body. In people with noodle body syndrome, though, your bone just disintegrates until it's gone, and the place where it once existed is overrun by soft tissue and lymphatic vessels, essentially turning you into a human Gumby, or Sam Jackson from Unbreakable.

That all sounds admittedly terrible but ultimately survivable, until the disease reaches your spine. Then it usually turns you into a paralyzed human ball of constant pain. What's even scarier is that, so far, Science's best answer to "Why is this shit happening?" is an embarrassed shrug. So, obviously, we don't know how to control or stop it, and our current treatments are more about mitigating pain rather than curing it altogether. One early test that is presumably effective is to ask yourself, "Have I suddenly gotten amazing at limbo?"

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You Could Suddenly Develop Unbearable, Crippling Pain In One Of Your Limbs

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Imagine if your body became allergic to pain. Every time you stub your (un-amputated) toe or sprain your ankle, your body has the mother of all overreactions and sends you into a whole new dimension of hurt. You experience severe burning pain that starts in one tiny place but then quickly spreads to your entire limb before making it swell and resemble a goth rainbow of purples, grays, and reds.

That's how it feels to live with complex regional pain syndrome.

Dr. Steven Richeimer

Now, to be fair, most people develop CRPS after serious stuff like surgeries or strokes, and the syndrome is usually caused by your malfunctioning nervous system. But sometimes it isn't, and sometimes it makes you want to die after slapping your hand a bit too hard on the wall while trying to kill a mosquito. What's arguably worse is that it doesn't even always take a bump to set the disease off. Sometimes CRPS can develop as a result of simply being too stressed out -- just worrying that you might get a CRPS attack is enough to trigger one, thus potentially sending you into a never-ending loop of torture and pain.

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The syndrome affects men and women of all ages and can even spread from one limb to another, making CRPS the closest thing to a malignant spider curse that actually exists. Now, there is a treatment that can mitigate the pain somewhat and help keep your limbs from completely dying, but as is so often the case with humanity's most awful diseases, there is no cure, because life is cruel and full of meaningless pain and suffering. So, you know, spend that extra dollar to get the large milkshake every now and then (assuming your arm isn't hurting too badly to grip it).

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For more ways we underestimate our fragile meatbags, check out 6 Ways Your Body Loves To Screw You (Explained By Science) and 7 Creepy Physical Changes Your Mind Can Make In Your Body.

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