With the bare walls of the establishment -- of all establishments, really -- just begging to be Costner-ized, Costner hasn't sat idle and has filled the place with memorabilia from his life. Props and costumes from classics like Field Of Dreams and Dances With Wolves line the walls, while a Bull Durham poster sexily watches people eat their baskets of calamari.
"Could someone turn that thing around?"
But the downside of an extensive collection of Costner-bilia is that it reveals just how many turds he's been in. What is The Guardian? Or Mr. Brooks? Up on the wall is some kind of doctor costume from the movie Dragonfly, which was about ... dragons? Dragons that need doctors? To help fly again? Also there must be some Waterworld stuff there too, just haunting the place, making all the drinks taste a little bit like urine. (OK, that's probably not true. But it should be.)
The Official Cheers Bars Had Dead-Eyed Robot Versions Of The Cast
Cheers taught us that all it takes to make your crippling substance-abuse problem tolerable is for everyone to know your name. Which is a fine premise to base an actual bar on as well, once you remove that pesky need for knowing or even caring about your customers' names. Which is how Cheers-branded bars began popping up in airports and hotels across the world in the 1990s. Not only were these bars called Cheers, perched at the end of the bar in many of them were horrific Chuck E. Cheese's automaton versions of Norm and Cliff.
United States Court of Appeals
Fated to get hammered for their entire miserable existence.
As you can probably tell, the replicas were less than perfect. Cliff had no mustache, Norm had aged a good 20 years, and both looked quite a bit less like human beings than they did the embalmed corpses of political cartoons. These discrepancies may not have been an accident, perhaps done to avoid paying likeness rights to the actors; the robots' names were also changed to "Hank" and "Bob." If you think that seems like bullshit, you're not alone: John Ratzenberger and George Wendt, the actors who played Cliff and Norm, thought so too and ended up suing Paramount over it, in a case that almost made it to the Supreme Court.
Roger L. Wollenberg/Pool via Bloomberg
Where everybody knows your name because it's written down on several important pieces of paper.
Yup, the United States Supreme Court had to decide whether shitty robot doppelgangers of sitcom characters swilling beer in airport bars were worth their time. Their eventual decision -- "Nah, not really" -- left it in the hands of a lower court, where the actors eventually settled with Paramount. We don't know what the terms of that settlement were, but seeing as there don't seem to be too many of those robots around anymore, we kind of hope they all ended up in George Wendt's basement, where they've become his best friends.
You can check out Carolyn's depressing Twitter account here.
What's The Best Fictional School To Attend? In the muggle world, we're not given the opportunity for a magical hat to tell us which school we should go to. Usually we just have to go to the high school closest to where we live or whatever college accepts our SAT scores and personal essay. This month, our goal is to determine what would be the best fictional school to go to. Join Jack, Daniel, and the rest of the Cracked staff, along with comedians Brandie Posey and Steven Wilber, as they figure out if it's a realistic school like Degrassi or West Beverly High, or an institution from a fantasy world like Hogwarts with its ghosts and dementors, or Bayside High, haunted by a monster known only to humans as Screech. Get your tickets here!
Also check out 7 Movies That Were Filmed In Terrifying Locations and 5 Photos That Shatter Your Image Of Horror Movie Locations.
Subscribe to our YouTube channel, and check out 8 Places You'll Recognize From The Background Of Every Movie, and other videos you won't see on the site!
Also, follow us on Facebook, and we'll follow you everywhere.