Indiana Jones Became A Sad, Creepy Grandpa
Unless you're a Nazi, a Communist, or the parent of one of his students, chances are you love Indiana Jones. He's like the dad you always wanted, if you wanted your dad to be cool, handsome, and best friends with a homeless Chinese boy for some reason.
The Depressing Epilogue:
You might think that the movie where Indy meets aliens was the most recent (and most undignified) place we left the character, but that's not exactly correct. Those who grew up in the '90s might remember a little show called The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles, which followed Indy's early adventures. One jazz-themed episode even featured a cameo from a saxophone-playing Harrison Ford.
"Where d'ya light this thing?"
While the show was primarily a prequel, it was bookended by scenes set in the '90s, where we see Indy the way we never wanted to: as an angry, senile old man. In the first episode, he's hanging around a museum (presumably yelling about how all the artifacts in the museum belong in a museum), where he promptly frightens and threatens to "clobber" two young children. To be fair, at this stage in his life, youths are way scarier than Nazis.
Then he punched a Latino kid, yelling "You will not betray me again, Satipo!"
Indy then forces the kids to listen to a story from his youth -- but not one of the awesome ones about the Holy Grail or the Ark of the Covenant, because these little jerks don't deserve them. This setup is how most of the episodes play out: Old Man Indy just starts reciting stories to anyone who will listen as he runs painfully banal errands. One involves Indy arguing with, then hitting on, a female postal worker.