Source: Wired
Today's news is like a less plausible version of the wacky fake headlines from 1980s movies set in the future. No reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every world event while maintaining their sanity, so we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).
Source: Wired
Source: New York Times
Source: AV Club
Source: AP
Source: Vanity Fair
Sources: NBC News
Sources: Chicago Tribune, Huffington Post
Source: Hollywood Reporter
Source: CNN