The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (1/26)

Trying to keep up with the news is like trying to clean up post-blizzard snow drifts by pissing on them. No reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every important headline while maintaining their sanity, so we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so).
Sources: New York Times, Gallup, FiveThirtyEight.com
Related: 3 Terrible Comedy Sequels (And 3 That Got It Right)
Source: CNN
Related: The 14 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (2/2)
Source: CNN