The FBI Trained Alaskan Men To Go Red Dawn On Soviet Invasion Forces
Alaska has been fighting it's own Cold War since the Ice Age ended and forgot to thaw it out. This knowledge of icy warfare, as well as the territory's close proximity to the Soviets, made it an important strategic location for the US during the longest-running game of nuclear chicken on record. The territory gave the country a serious headache. It was too vast a swath of land to fortify, but it could not be left undefended. If the Russians crossed the Bering Strait into Alaska, what would be there to stop them? Simultaneously solving the problem and developing what could've been a groundbreaking reality television show, the US decided it would train a crack team of bear-hunting, bush-living locals.
Michael Multari via Fort Greely
If the Russians wanted to fry their balls during interrogation, they'd have to unfreeze them first.
Between 1951 and 1959, the US government assembled men from all walks of life and informed them that they were to become a counterinsurgency force to operate in the unforgiving wilderness should a Soviet invasion take place. Expecting to come up against bears or moose, any invaders would be facing Alaskan guerrillas instead. The most alarming part of this whole Arctic A-Team was the document which outlined the ideal profile of recruits. The imaginative descriptions read like a Federal Mad-lib: They want a [one-armed photographer] who is also a [pilot] and hunts [Kodiak bears] with a [bow and arrow].
US Air Force
"He's well-versed in [eats boogers] and studied in [poopy butt]."
Whether the FBI found their one-armed bear tracker is unknown, but the declassified documents do tell us that there were at least 89 men trained to run operations against the Soviets in the Alaskan wilderness. They were picked for their experience in the wild, and then run through training in the urban jungle that is Seattle. And if you're wondering if any of the selected badasses were natives, the answer is: It was the '50s. It was extremely the '50s.
US Air Force
"Weird how these people we're treating as useless drunks don't want to be loyal to us."