8

The 6 Greatest War Heroes Who Got Screwed Out of History

Er... at least he eventually got recognized? Dick move, Japan.

"The fact that Chiune saved thousands of people from slaughter took a distant back seat to the fact that he disobeyed an order, pretty much the worst thing a Japanese person could do at the time. He may as well have been working around the clock stabbing 6,000 puppies."

7

5 Ways Marvel Movies Keep Screwing Up Female Superheroes

There's such a total void of Black Widow merchandise that even Mark Ruffalo publicly tweeted Marvel about the problem. You know, the company that regularly drives dump trucks full of money to his house.

6

9 Regular Objects Turned into Insane Prison Weapons

Incarcerated MacGyvers discovered that you can make a flamethrower out of powdered coffee creamer!

"The granules would pass through the flame and ignite like a Rammstein concert, so most prisons nowadays cruelly force their inmates to drink their coffee black."

5

5 Reasons Even Gun Owners Should Hate The NRA

If you're a gun-owning, dues-paying member of the NRA, it doesn't give two shits what you think - it's around to act as a hype/PR man for the gun lobby. "The NRA represents regular gun owners the same way the National Pork Board represents regular pigs."

4

The 6 Most Badass Airline Pilots To Ever Stare Down Death

The cockpit window shattered. A flight attendant held onto the pilot's legs as he dangled into the clouds. And the co-pilot? He landed that winged bastard on the ground.

"Aside from the flight attendant next to him clutching the pilot's legs with all of his strength, the sudden decompression also pulled the cockpit door into the cockpit, which blocked access to the throttle. When Atchison tried to get on the radio to declare an emergency, he couldn't hear the response due to all the chaos erupting around him."

3

Bicycles Cause Lesbians: The 26 Weirdest Moral Panics Ever

Man, do we miss Oprah.

2

Everyone Assumes You're Violent: Realities Of Being Bipolar

"Catastrophic organ failure" is a disturbingly common side effect you'll see in the fine print on bipolar disorder medication, but according to our source, "I need the medication, and taking time to find the right one is absolutely worth the brutal trial and error."

"For reasons of laziness, and the generally low number of practicing psychiatrists who are also screenwriters, bipolar disorder is often portrayed by Hollywood as 'generic crazy person's disease.' As a result, people with the disorder are forced to deal with the double-decker suck-bus of a life complicated by mental illness, and having everyone around them think they're a dangerous lunatic just waiting to bloom."

1

The 12 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (7/14)

Texas knows that the best way to do history is to ignore it completely.