When forced to live with complete strangers, wolves will unsurprisingly form hierarchies to establish some sort of pecking order -- but, that's simply not how it works in the wild. Mech, realizing his mistake, has spent years trying to quash the myth and begging the publisher to stop reprinting his book that originally made it famous. More recent research reveals that wild wolf packs are basic family units, and the "alpha" is just a wolf who found a lonely lady wolf to bone. Then, they had some pups that will, one day, go off to do the same.

JohnPitcher/iStock/Getty Images
"I am an assmaster, like my father before me."

And those brutal dominance displays? Well, that really only happens around feeding time. Turns out, it's just the parents keeping their older pups from, er, wolfing down all the food before the younger siblings have gotten their share. So, it's not evidence of a brutal society run by violence -- it's just Dad making sure everybody gets a slice of pizza before the dickhead big brother goes in for seconds.

But, Science Says:

Enter Dr. Bryan Fry, a biochemist and molecular biologist who cares more about the oral hygiene of giant death-lizards than is generally considered healthy this side of a supervillain.

Bryan Grieg Fry
He's the Targaryen whose invitation to the family reunion keeps getting "lost in the mail."

Fry's studies have shown that Komodo dragons really don't have festering rot-chops at all. To the contrary, he's observed them cleaning their mouths after meals to a near obsessive-compulsive degree -- an odd habit for a creature that relies on its squalid bite to hunt. Lab tests further revealed that the average dragon has 128 bacterial species in its kisser, and not one of them is capable of causing an infection that could kill so quickly. We humans, by comparison, have at least that many (probably more). And, with the possible exception of your college roommate who lives on Hot Pockets and Mountain Dew, we probably aren't going to be bringing down a wildebeest with the nastiness of our saliva anytime soon.

Paul Robinson/iStock/Getty Images
His kissing booth would be worth billions.

So, what's the origin of the rotten bite myth? Well, it turns out we've had it precisely ass-backward from the get-go. It's not the predator that's a filthy, gaping bag of bacteria -- it's the prey. Specifically, the Komodo dragon's favorite snack: the water buffalo. The water buffalo is not native to the Komodo dragon's Indonesian home. Meddling humans took them from their mainland Asian habitat -- where they were accustomed to huge, idyllic fresh marshes that they could shit all over to their hearts' content -- to some small islands with a few tiny ponds here and there. And you probably don't need a doctorate in molecular biology to figure out that cannonballing into a combination sink/bathtub/toilet while having a gaping wound might present significant risk of infection.

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The water was blue two minutes ago.

As a matter of fact, Dr. Fry goes so far as to posit that, if any wild Komodo dragon specimens tested over the years have exhibited higher than normal levels of oral bacteria, it was specifically due to the fact that they had been munching on a filthy-ass water buffalo. So, we all owe a collective apology to the noble Komodo dragon and a collective "that's nasty" to the water buffalo.

To put it in numbers, baby rattlesnakes are capable of delivering up to 70 milligrams of venom, whereas an adult can deliver up to 666 milligrams -- a good six times the lethal dose and proof that Mother Nature is metal as hell.

The sad truth is that we seem to have an innate human desire to be disgusted, and "one rat for every human" is simply too gross to resist repeating ad infinitum. Reality is far less dramatic, however: Jonathan Auerbach, a PhD student and statistics wizard, recently conducted a study and found that New Yorkers outnumber rats by at least four to one. According to Auerbach, less than 5 percent of New York's lots are rat-infested -- about 2 million in the city, tops -- and that's a generous overestimation.

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So, if you see shit on the subway, it probably wasn't Rizzo The Rat's fault. More likely, Elmo's.

And Auerbach's not the only one trying to debunk the rat myth. Robert Sullivan, a rat expert and author of the concisely titled Rats: Observations On The History And Habitat Of The City's Most Unwanted Inhabitants, says that Auerbach's conclusion really isn't news and that "anybody who knows anything about rats knows there aren't 8 million rats." Auerbach's next study will presumably seek to answer why Robert Sullivan is such a jerk about it.

But, Science Says:

First of all, the belief that eating an animal will allow you to gain its biological characteristics is crazy. You don't eat a fistful of spiders and become Spider-Man -- you just become that weirdo nobody sits next to on the bus. But, despite studies showing that dietary shark supplements have absolutely no effect on malignant tumors and, in fact, lead people away from real, effective treatments that could actually save their lives, the homeopathic remedy community is difficult to sway. Millions worldwide still insist that consuming shark bits will cure you of cancer, in much the same way monks should eat panda bears to cure them of sexual desire.

Robertus Pudyanto/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Sharks don't get AIDS ... doesn't mean you should fuck these.

Then, there's the fact that sharks absolutely do get cancer. Being all cartilaginous might make them less likely to get it (as does their inability to purchase Marlboros or climb into a tanning bed), but "less risk" isn't synonymous with "immune." Don't believe us? Here's a depressing picture of a Great White sporting a massive tumor on its face:

Andrew Fox / Sam Cahir
Lower Jaws: The Removal.

This isn't an isolated case, either -- to date, tumors have been observed in 23 species. And rates of shark cancer are steadily increasing, most likely due to increased sea pollution. So, we're poisoning their home, giving them cancer, and then harvesting them to erroneously fight our own cancer. That's it: We're pitching a new film from the shark's point-of-view. Thumbs -- just when you thought it was safe to live in the water ...

We're just not great at this whole "facts" thing. We can't even get shit right about ourselves. To see what we mean, check out The 5 Most Statistically Full of Shit National Stereotypes. Or see what else we get wrong about our furry and not-furry friends in The 6 Most Frequently Quoted Bullshit Animal Facts.

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