All news media seems designed specifically to either make you hate reading the news or hate being alive. No reasonable person can be expected to keep up with every important headline while maintaining their sanity, so we have taken it upon ourselves to quickly summarize the most important and/or ridiculous news stories from the last week (or so):

I IDENTIFY AS BLACK. Rachel A. Dolezal stepped down as president of the Spokane N.A.A.C.P. Chapter, but refuses to admit to any wrongdoing. While th

Source: Bloomberg

The 13 Most Insane Things Happening Right Now (6/23)

Source: USA Today

JURASSIG WORLD RAKED $511.8 IN MILLION WORLDWIDE DURING ITS OPENING WEEKEND, THE FIRST TIME A FILM HAS EVER OPENED ABOVE THE HALF-BILLION MARK, BLOWIN

Source: News.com.au

YOU KNOW, THE PROBLEM WITH ALLOWING WOMEN IN SCIENCE LABS IS YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH THEM, THEY FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU, AND WHEN YOU CRITICIZE THEM, THE

Source: TheStar.com

CONSIDERED BY MANY TO BE ONE OF THE BEST CONSOLE GAMES EVER, SHENMUE SAW ITS LONG-AWAITED THIRD INSTALLMENT GIVEN LIFE ON KICKSTARTER. The campaign hi

A BRIDGE IN PENNSYLVANIA HAD TO BE CLOSED WHEN A SWARM OF MAYFLIES BECAME SO THICK THAT IT LOWERED VISIBILITY TO BLIZZARD-LIKE CONDITIONS. The swarm a

A SERIES OF RULINGS FROM MEXICO'S SUPREME COURT HAS HAD THE EFFECT OF LEGALIZING GAY MARRIAGE. While the law itself remains unchanged, the court has b

THE FBI IS INVESTIGATING' THE ST. LOUIS CARDINALS FOR HACKING A HOUSTON ASTROS DATABASE. Cardinals employees allegedly accessed statistics, scouting

Source: ESPN

IT'S OFFICIAL: POPE FRANCIS SAYS IT'S YOUR FAULT THE PLANET IS GOING TO HECK IN A HANDBASKET. Criticizing political shortsightedness, the pursuit of p

Source: MSNBC

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