Chances are your mom spent a significant portion of your childhood instilling in you the immense importance of a good smile. School picture day? Smile! You just opened your Christmas present from Grandma and it was socks? Smile! At the ER with bone fragments jutting out of your calf and your kneecap dangling free? Smile! You never know when your future spouse might be watching!
Photos.com "Now was that so hard?"
Well the next time mom calls while you're just trying to watch Game of Thrones, jeez, be sure to thank her for making the world hate you. Because despite everything she told you about a smiling face's ability to endear you to potential love interests, studies performed by researchers at the University of British Columbia actually found the opposite to be true -- at least for guys. The researchers found that when presented with pictures of the same man in a variety of poses -- happy, proud, ashamed, and neutral -- female participants consistently rated the happy man as the least attractive. So what did they find most attractive? Men who took on "swaggering or brooding poses."
Photos.com Just try not to overshoot it on the brood.
But as we said before, this applies only to men. On the other side of the gender aisle, it turns out that mom was in fact doing you ladies a favor, because the same study found that the results were the precise opposite for women: Men consistently rated the happy women highest and the proud ones lowest. So, apparently, men prefer their women to look happy, while women prefer their men to look like assholes.
Photos.com Well, you've got the asshole look down, but that's not exactly what we meant.
It all goes back to the same Western gender norms as the hair-parting thing -- on an unconscious level, we tend to judge smiling as a "more feminine and less dominant" behavior than, say, horking up a loogie while scratching one's balls, and this long-reinforced prejudice has an almost reflexive effect on the first impressions that others make on us.
It's no more logical or fair than the rest of the list, but hey -- don't shoot the messenger.
Peter loves his homegirl Jess, and wants you to check out his buddy's awesome game Ascendant.
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Related Reading: Here's some bad news- your close up profile picture is making people hate you. On the opposite side of things you have stupid shit people act proud of. Like hating popular movies and books. Oh, and while we're puncturing your faith in man, get this: looking at alcohol makes you racist.