Well, the analytical mind behind the Sherlock Holmes stories didn't just say "that's neat" and go about his business: He wrote a whole damned book about why fairies are real and why it's totally not ridiculous for a grown man to be obsessed with such teenage girl nonse- Oh no. Oh Jesus Christ, Arthur Conan Doyle was a brony.
The book opens with the not-at-all batshit argument that since water animals stay in the water and land creatures stay on land, it's equally plausible that fairies are separated from our view by some "difference of vibrations." It's pretty much all downhill from there. Doyle even brings in testimony from his own kids, and the notion that the whole lot of them are little goddamned liars isn't even considered.
No, it had to be fairies stealing the cookies and setting fire to the cat.
The real pisser? The girls who faked the photos took the fairy drawings from a book that included a short story by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Either he didn't get a free copy of the publication and never saw the original pictures, or he was so desperate to believe in magic that he conveniently forgot about them.
Benjamin Franklin Wrote an Essay About Farts
The venerable Benjamin Franklin invented things like the lightning rod, bifocal glasses, and the United States of America. Or at least he helped out in that last one. The most famous piece of writing that Franklin had a hand in creating was a little thing called the Declaration of Independence, followed by his classic autobiography, which is still one of the most influential books in the genre. After all, it's hard to compete with a guy who did such a great service to his nation and to the world throughout his life.
Yep, this looks about right.
But He Also Wrote ...
"To the Royal Academy of Farting" (also known as "Fart Proudly"), a 1,000-word academic essay about why farts are awesome. In it, the Founding Father argues that scientific resources should be used to come up with a way to make farts smell more like perfume so that civilized people could then compare the odors coming out of their buttholes instead of shunning them. He also claims that not farting can cause disastrous consequences.
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Pulling off a convincing "'Twasn't me" face wasn't among his many talents.
Franklin's motivation for writing the essay was not entirely scientific. In 1781, he was serving as the American ambassador in France when he decided to go to a conference at the Academy of Brussels in Belgium. There, he was confronted with dozens of academic books about scientific, political, and other "educational topics." Franklin's reaction to such a wealth of accumulated knowledge was "What a load of wank." Appalled at what he considered a bunch of pretentious assholes jerking each other off about the most trivial topics imaginable, he decided to get in on that action, but with the most obnoxious topic possible. Namely farts.
Understandably, all the serious academics who read it reacted as if a wet ass-blast had been released directly in their faces. Franklin simply kicked his feet back and watched as people debated the 1700s equivalent of the Onion. He had already summed up his opinion about those academics at the end of the article when he said that all other scientific discussions were "scarcely worth a FART-HING." OK, he might have been drunk when he wrote it.
Dustin Koski is also the author of stuff like this and is very sorry about this. SURPRISE! Evan V. Symon can be found on Facebook, and be sure to bookshelf and vote for his new book, The End of the Line. Richie Ryan has also been known to work the wood. See his things and follow him on Twitter.
Related Reading: For more famous authors doing things you wouldn't expect, give this article a read. You'll learn that Louisa May Alcott's love for money and drugs was the fuel to her writing. And while you're being surprised about authors, you might as well learn about the erotic lesbian novel written by Dick Cheney's wife. Finish off your literary binge with some authors who were more badass than the characters they created.