But so what? Pests are getting fatter and slower -- if anything, that's a good thing, right? Actually, no. The test was designed to determine if pollution could have an effect on human obesity. It's not clear yet that there's a definite link, but it means that every time you decide to drive instead of walk, you're potentially not only making yourself fatter, but also contributing to everyone else's fat ass as well.
"I'm on a diet."
Animals Are Getting Sexually Frustrated
Take a minute right now to stop and listen to everything around you. Chances are you will hear cars, a plane, maybe some music, people talking and at the very least the hum of your computer. The point is, you are almost always surrounded by man-made noise. We're just noisy creatures, and our technology has only amplified the problem. While most of us have gotten used to it, or even come to enjoy it, we're certainly not the only ones who have to listen to it.
For animals, we are the worst goddamn neighbors in the world. Aside from the light pollution and the very literal pollution that we're responsible for, we're also indirectly keeping animals from having sex with each other.
From bats, frogs and owls to dolphins and crabs, we're messing up their lives with all our noise. And for animals with mating calls (like frogs and birds), we are ruining their love lives. The main problem is that they just can't hear each other.
In the case of tree frogs, the male's mating calls can't compete with traffic noise. Environmentalists are so worried about it that they expect to see huge dips in population. With birds, the noise is causing them to leave cities in droves in favor of somewhere they can actually attract a mate.
Or at the very least a place where they can pay for it.
Some birds, however, have decided to stick it out and are forcing themselves to sing even louder. Nightingales in Berlin, for instance, have started singing at decibel levels equal to a motorcycle. Birds have actually made themselves hoarse doing it, which has researchers worried that this will lead to either birds leaving cities altogether or the evolution of a race of birds with supervoices.
Now think back to the entry about the cursing birds and imagine a future where the trees all scream slurs at us at a volume louder than a jackhammer.
It would basically be like playing at any New York sporting event.
Kathy helped write a charity book, which you can buy here. Karl didn't help write that book, but he did write all this, and he's also on Facebook.