Attention all passengers waiting for flight LP236 to Chicago, it looks like we've got another delay here. There is a mechanical issue with the plane. Our maintenance crew is working on it now, but it's going to take some time to get this sorted out. Our best estimate is that this will take another hour.
What You Can Do Now
You should probably be glad they're not compromising your safety. Sit quietly and nod. This is an entirely appropriate delay, and you applaud and salute their airplane-related perfectionism.
Aircraft Mechanics: Sober 74 percent of the time.
Not like those other babies at the gate. Like that chubby dude there with the glasses. It looks like he's about to cry. No one wants to be in Chicago that badly. Could he miss his family that much? Or more likely, miss his MMORPG that much?
This delay means that you're probably not going to get home until something like midnight. You should eat. Remember the last time you tried to go eight hours on nothing but airplane candy and had to take a day off work? Constipation Related Absence does not look good on the old timesheet. So yeah, use this time to your advantage and get a nice hot meal. See if you can find the mandatory "Irish pub" that's in every damned airport. It will be called Flighty O'Leary's or something. There you can have the extremely Irish sounding Cajun chicken sandwich. Just like mom used to make when she had flight delays.
Everything on this plate has been dead since the Carter administration.
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