This finding was the result of a study performed in Australia in 2003 in which over 2,300 men, some with prostate cancer and some without, were asked a series of questions about their sexual activity, specifically focusing on masturbation to eliminate the influence of STDs from the mix. The results indicated that the men who tickled their Elmo more than five times a week had a 30 percent reduced risk of developing prostate cancer, with the best effects showing on the subjects in their 20s.
Presented to BootyBarn.com
So, taking into account the widespread availability of online pornography, we estimate that prostate cancer will be eliminated as a disease sometime around next week or so.
The reason behind why dickwhittling might protect against the most predominant form of male cancer is still unclear, but scientists believe it might have something to do with flushing out your system and thereby preventing harmful components from amassing inside your prostate. And there's been some doubt cast on the study, primarily the argument that some of the men involved might have lied on the questionnaire. Though we submit that if given a series of questions about your masturbatory habits by some clean-cut doctors doing a national study, not a single one of us is going to answer with a higher number.
"Actually doctor, I'm masturbating right now."
Cezary Jan Strusiewicz is a freelance online journalist and Japanese-English-Polish translator. Contact him via firstname.lastname@example.org
Find out how else your disgustingess is keeping you alive, in 6 Slacker Behaviors That Science Says Are Good For You. Or learn about how Grandpa's cough medicine really can be medicinal, in The 6 Most Surprising Ways Alcohol Is Actually Good for You.
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