The Debate Over Britney Spears' Skills as a Mother-There' nothing funnier to me than the self-righteous fury of bored housewives in Nebraska fuming over
The Obsession with Celebrity Couples-Fuck, I can't even keep up anymore. Before there were 8,000 gossip magazines and Internet blogs and shitty celeb-worshipping cable shows, I could generally ignore the latest rumors about which movie stars were putting their genitals into which other movie stars. But now, I can't even walk down the street without seeing some asshole in a "TomKat" T-shirt that will be completely irrelevant in about eight weeks. Why do people spend so much of their time and energy worrying about the publicist-fabricated fairy tales of the love lives of two-dimensional people who wouldn't be capable of an actual relationship if their life (or anything other than their Q-rating) depended on it? It' pretty much the equivalent of watching ants mate, then desperately hoping they stay together in the end.