The Most Self-Consciously 2025 Jokes From the ‘King of the Hill’ Premiere, Ranked From Least to Most Shameful
When I reviewed the new 14th season of King of the Hill a couple of weeks ago, I wrote that the first episode was redolent with cranky references to contemporary life as experienced by Hank (voice of Mike Judge) and Peggy (Kathy Najimy), just returned from a six-year stint at Aramco in Saudi Arabia.
For any who may not have believed a show as smart as King of the Hill would trade in such corny and expected material, here’s proof: a complete list of the most aggressively 2025 jokes in the Season 14 premiere, ranked from least to most shameful.
Bathroom Signs
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On the drive back from the airport, Hank asks to stop at a taco place, since Mexican food was the only thing they couldn’t get right on the base in Saudi Arabia.
There, Hank can’t parse what the pictures on the doors denote: They both have chin-length hair, they’re both in pants, but does Hank align more with the roper brandishing a lariat, or the matador with a cape? Another patron cheerfully tells him they’re both all-gender, so why would this fictional restaurant get so cute with the illustrations, other than that so many real-life restaurants do? Just put “Restroom” on the doors and move on.
Car Idling
When their rideshare driver Mohammed (Maz Jobrani) stops at lights, Hank is concerned that there’s something wrong with his car, which completely shuts off. Mohammed assures him that it’s just because it’s a hybrid. I guess I’m a Hank because I also find this disconcerting! (Possibly because I learned to drive on an elderly Dodge Diplomat that would stall at lights and require the driver to rock it back and forth to start it again. The memory haunts me.)
The Internet of Things
The episode ends on Hank and Peggy having their friends over for burgers, Hank bragging about the fancy new Wagner grill he couldn’t have gotten in Saudi Arabia. “It comes with a touch screen, pre-set cooking profiles and Wi-Fi for remote temperature monitoring.” His friends marvel.
“Yep,” Hank adds, “they’re all over there. I shouldn’t have to call technical support to make a burger.” He’s right!
Electric Scooters
Hank and Peggy are already in a sour mood about the many changes to Arlen life since they left when they pull in at Mega Lo Mart.
It doesn’t help when a rude jerk on an electric scooter heedlessly cuts them off. This isn’t even really a joke so much as a reference, but once again, I’m with Hank (and Will from Platonic, who spent much of Season One kicking them down or flinging them over fences): Those things are dumb, and the people who use them aren’t safe. Also why is the footbed the width of only one human foot? That made sense on the original scooter you had to propel with your other foot, but not now!
Rideshare Apps
“Well, I don’t see how this is any easier than a taxi,” Hank sighs outside the airport as he signs up for the Trypp app. Later, he annoys his driver Mohammed by only rating him four stars: “That way it gives you something to work towards!” Mohammed, in return, rates Hank a two, meaning two people left the interaction unsatisfied when, 20 years ago, both he and his cab driver would have moved on with their lives never thinking of each other again. Another point to Hank.
Solar Panels
Brian (Keith David), the Hills’ very conscientious and considerate subletter, leaves a note letting them know their water heater has about four years left in it, and leaves a brochure about solar panels. “What other religious propaganda did they leave?” Hank grumbles. It’s a knee-jerk reaction, but not one that’s out of character for someone who spent his whole career working with propane and propane accessories, and when Hank sees Brian in the alley the next morning, he doesn’t bring it up. Live and let live!
Girl Scout Cookies
Crabby outside Mega Lo Mart, Peggy and Hank take it out on the Girl Scouts selling cookies next to the door. “Are they gluten-free now?” Hank pouts. “Yeah, and they are also probably $50 a box,” Peggy snits. “And by the way,” Hank adds, “what is a ‘Metaverse’? Is that involved here in some way?”
The Scouts cheerfully tell them they’re only $5, unless they do want gluten-free; those are $6. When Hank asks for his favorites, Samoas, the first Scout explains that they’re called Caramel Delites now, out of respect for people from Samoa. Grouchiness dissipated, Hank realizes he can’t be mad about that choice, and the Scout shrugs that it’s nice to be nice. It is, and thank goodness these Scouts were at this particular Mega Lo Mart just when the Hills needed to be reassured that there is still goodness in the world.
Identity Theft
When Dale (Johnny Hardwick) ran for mayor of Arlen while the Hills were gone, he had to do a little scrambling for eligibility: “It cost me $37 to buy the Social Security number I needed in order to run. It used to belong to a dead four-year-old.” Appalling, but Hank’s “Dale! Augh” is one of the episode’s better moments.
Netflix
Between the Hills’ departure and the pandemic that followed shortly thereafter, Bill (Stephen Root) has been at loose ends. “I finished Netflix, Hank!” he says. “Did you know that when you get to the end of Netflix you get something called a wellness check?” Judging by the state of Bill in this episode, it wasn’t very effective, but not a bad line.
Traffic
For what were probably well-researched safety reasons, the street Hank uses to turn left into his alley when he’s coming from the south has a new traffic pattern that doesn’t permit left turns or U-Turns where he needs them. Everyone who lives in the apartment complex I always have to turn into to get home from my post office without going a mile out of my way probably shares Hank’s irritation at these kinds of traffic patterns; I also agree that the soft plastic barriers seem to “lack conviction.”
Gender Expression
Coming back out from the baffling bathroom signs at the restaurant, Hank asks Peggy if they’re “all-gender.” Peggy believes she is “female-presenting.” These simply aren’t phrases I ever needed to hear these characters say, particularly if they don’t have anything funny to say about them.
Online Food Delivery
Bill hasn’t needed to leave his room since 2020 (according to Brian), thanks to convenient restaurant delivery apps whose drivers leave your food on the porch. Implicitly blaming Bill’s significant weight gain on the apps seems unfair: What about Bill’s undiagnosed depression?
Exotic New Foods
Hank doesn’t know what “boba” or “poke” are, and that’s enough to make him suspicious. I’ve never been more sure of anything than I am that he will never try either.
Cancelled
The all-gender bathroom chunk closes on Hank telling Peggy, “I don’t want to be presenting my maleness to any kind of woman that walks in on me. That’s how you get cancelled, Peggy.” What ending could be more predictable than this?
Anxiety
Boomhauer (Judge) has a girlfriend with a son, Luke Jr. We don’t glean much information about him since Boomhauer’s enunciation hasn’t improved in the Hills’ absence.
But we can make out that Luke Jr. is still wearing his mask (on his chin) because he has anxiety. Hank frowns in dismay. Do NOT let him read last week’s New York magazine cover story about ARFID!
Slang
When we see Bobby (Pamela Adlon) at Robota Chane, his German-Japanese fusion restaurant in Dallas, he’s serving a table full of college students who use slang like “It’s giving summer in Kyoto” and “Okay, flex.” Yes, the way young people speak can be annoying. At least we escaped a rant on the filler word “like.”
COVID
The references to COVID — from Luke Jr.’s mask, to the anti-mask platform Dale ran on (though he was opposed to all masks: for COVID, tear gas, baseball catchers), to the new credits montage of time passing, including the guys standing masked in the alley, six feet apart — are about as funny as the actual pandemic was. Though at least Bill’s self-isolation explains how he and his presumably multiple pre-existing conditions made it through alive.
Internalized Misogyny
One of Bobby’s college-student patrons complains about his classes focusing on his internalized misogyny. Even on a show where the main college-aged kid is NOT enrolled, we have to hear about campus culture wars?
Election Denial
Though an 11-candidate race meant Dale won the mayoralty with just 9 percent of the vote, he left office almost immediately, questioning his victory as an “election denier denier.” Considering how things have ended up with the real election deniers, I’d just as soon skip any “comedic” reminders about them.
Hashtag
Running into Connie (Lauren Tom) on campus after a hookup, Bobby discusses his changing relationship with social media, and how he now prefers to promote body positivity: “Hashtag thicc.”
In 2025?! Move on dot org!