Hi! Welcome to the Internet, where everything that can be used for sexual purposes is and already has been exploited by our genitals. To a horrifying extent. But the same thing happens in reverse: Lots of products you thought were the exclusive domain of your down-there areas are in fact used in some surprisingly practical ways. So next time you're admiring the toy collection in your sex dungeon, take a minute to remember that ...
5 K-Y Jelly Makes Movie Magic
You're on a movie set and the director hands you a bottle of lube, ordering you to slather it all over that terrifying latex-coated monster in the corner. No, you're not some sort of indentured porn-slave -- those days are behind you. Now you're just making a horror movie.
No, not a "horror movie." An actual horror movie.
K-Y Jelly, your grandmother's favorite lube, is a standard tool for movie special effects.
Alien had a lot of subtle and not-so-subtle sexual imagery laced throughout, but one piece of sex paraphernalia you probably didn't notice was the veritable ocean of K-Y Jelly it took to make the film. According to cast and crew in the making-of documentary, everything from puppets to people was absolutely covered in a thick, dripping layer of bone-lube. If you were scared of Xenomorphs as a child, you might be relieved to learn that their disgusting toxic spit was merely the result of some special effects guy dumping the entire contents of a tube of K-Y into its mouth. You may actually be less than relieved to hear that, now that we think about it.
20th Century Fox
In space, no one can hear you cream.
But it wasn't just Alien. Remember the glowing neon-green blood from the Predator franchise? That wasn't a post-production effect -- Predator blood is a simple combination of K-Y Jelly and the liquid in glow sticks. The glow faded fast, so they kept cases of K-Y on hand to keep that movie magic rolling. And in John Carpenter's The Thing, virtually every monster was slathered in K-Y, giving the film its unsettlingly wet look. If something in a movie is gooey, slimy, and terrifying, it's probably K-Y. Hey look, K-Y -- a new tagline for your commercials! You can thank us later. Via cash.
K-Y is also an essential product in the makeup artist's kit, since it makes fake wounds look fresh and removes expensive latex prosthetics without damaging them.
New Line Cinema
Or the things they're attached to.
K-Y is so ubiquitous on movie sets that it's even used when common sense would dictate otherwise. Near the end of Titanic, Kate Winslet's character spits in her evil fiance's face. They went through so many takes that Winslet's mouth dried out, and rather than just give her a bottle of water, they put K-Y on her tongue and had her spit that all over those perfectly arched, villainous eyebrows instead.
If spitting sex lube onto Billy Zane was not already a bizarre niche fetish, it sure as hell is now.