6 Terrifying Real Speeches That Were Thankfully Never Given
American history is littered with inspiring and comforting speeches. Some of the best writers, thinkers and speakers in history have studied language so that, in times of crisis, they can eloquently reassure the American people that they "have a dream" and are prepared to ask "what they can do for their country" and "did not have sexual relations with that woman." They calm the nation down with their confidence and soothing warmth. Everything's going to be OK.
But just because we didn't hear speeches for when the whole country was going to shit doesn't mean they were never written ...
#6. Kennedy's "Second Speech" During the Cuban Missile Crisis
During the height of the Cuban Missile Crisis and about halfway into X-Men: First Class, President John F. Kennedy delivered a televised address to the nation disclosing the presence of offensive Soviet missiles in Cuba. Also, they were nuclear, and could strike at just about anywhere in North America. And that shit was about to get very real for the planet unless the Soviets acted like gentlemen and pulled out when they were told to. Kennedy's administration had two basic options: full-on attack Cuba, or "quarantine" Cuba by creating a much less violent naval blockade.
Kennedy's Joint Chiefs of Staff were very pro airstrike, but Kennedy and his speechwriter were not. They went with the option that didn't end up killing everybody, a point Kennedy illustrated in his speech. It wasn't a comforting speech (still brought up the whole "Cuba has missiles" thing), but it was still much better than his other option.
"So yeah. In about four seconds, everyone is going to die."
As it turns out, an alternate speech was drafted, one that presented the "Let's bomb the shit out of Cuba" plan. Kennedy's speechwriter Ted Sorensen doesn't know who wrote this second draft and, judging from his take on it, sure as hell did not like what it would have led to.
Was this speech written by JFK himself, or worse ... someone from within the Joint Chiefs of Staff? That question remains one of the many unresolved mysteries surrounding the Cuban Missile Crisis.
The Most Chilling Part:
"I have ordered -- and the United States Air Force has now carried out -- military operations with conventional weapons to remove a major nuclear weapons build-up from the soil of Cuba," which was dandy, since at the time Cuba had essentially been converted into one giant Doomsday Machine.
American Military and Naval History
Just the surface of an atomic submarine about the size of the Caribbean.
What Hearing It Would Have Meant:
Well, for one thing, that the Joint Chiefs of Staff had effectively conquered the U.S. presidency. Khrushchev himself later commented that the USSR feared a coup was imminent within the White House between the president and the Joint Chiefs during the Cuban Missile Crisis, and it looks like President Kennedy himself shared this sentiment.
Soviet Views on the Cuban missile crisis
As for what this would have meant following the airstrike, Robert L. O'Connell discussed such a scenario in an essay appropriated called The Cuban Missile Crisis: Second Holocaust. We encourage you to read the whole essay, because it's haunting and terrifying, but here's the short version: The U.S. destroys most, but not all, of the completed missiles in Cuba, Cuba retaliates with its remaining missiles, which land in D.C., killing JFK and LBJ, and the U.S. responds by firing nuclear warhead after nuclear warhead until "Cuba is completely destroyed, with 95 percent of its population being killed," and the resultant radiation spreads through the Caribbean and southern Florida. Oh, and the Soviet Union is virtually exterminated. Lots of people are dead, and the ones who aren't are really, really sad.
Luckily, that didn't happen though.
(Hopefully you knew that without us telling you.)
Getty
"Hmm. I don't remember everyone dying. But most of June was a blur."
#5. The Apollo 11 Disaster
In 1969, the United States of America pulled off one of the most impressive come-from-behind successes in stellar history since the Battle of Endor: It put two men on the moon and successfully brought them back to Earth. No Ewoks were harmed, and none of the crew were transformed into members of the Fantastic Four -- so they say.
Still, since the eyes of the world were watching America's every single move during the Apollo 11 mission right down to the smallest crap-up, Nixon's then-speechwriter William Safire prepared the following remarks in the event that Apollo astronauts Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were condemned to a fate straight out of a horror movie: death on the moon.
University of Illinois
"They will most likely hold rudimentary elections for 'Moon King' and set up a series of 'Space Laws' and 'Moon Holidays' before slowly dying of Moon Madness, the noblest of all Moon Brain sicknesses."
The speech went on to praise the men who laid down their lives in "mankind's most noble goal: the search for truth and understanding," and brought up a touching, albeit on-the-nose and kind of creepy comparison:
"In ancient days, men looked at stars and saw their heroes in the constellations. In modern times, we do much the same, but our heroes are epic men of flesh and blood."
It's kind of sweet, but also kind of weird. "Hey, you know how people used to see Orion and other warriors when they looked up at night? Well you can, too, except instead of a series of stars, it will be the bones of Neil Armstrong! Always, haunting you from his moon tomb. Goodnight!"
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"The moon represents our spirit of innovation. And also the inevitability of gruesome death. Happy Moon Day, kids!"
The Most Chilling Part:
"These brave men, Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin, know that there is no hope for their recovery."
What Hearing It Would Have Meant:
A pretty down ending to one of the most hopeful moments in human history. Be it from death by starvation or suicide or being swallowed by the mighty Moon Worm, the single brightest object in the night sky nearly became a gigantic graveyard: a floating symbol of death for all humankind.
And of all people, Richard Nixon was the person who would have broken the news to us.
Getty
"It will comfort you to know that thing they heard was my comforting voice. Nixon's comforting voice. Hsssssssss!"
#4. D-Day Fails
June 6, 1944, the date of the Normandy invasion during World War II, is often marketed as the turning point of the 20th century by everyone from Steven Spielberg to Electronic Arts. And why? Because when it comes to turning points in history that make for fantastic video games, Hitler Getting Rejected by the Vienna Academy of Art just doesn't have as much draw to it as does Medal of Honor: Frontline.
Still, the Normandy landings were far from the slam dunk that most first-person shooters make us believe, since the Allies had someone even more unruly than Hitler to contend with leading up to the invasion: the sea god Neptune. Bad weather forced the Allies to postpone the invasion from the tentative June 5 date, and they nearly had to kick this date down to June 19, which sure enough "brought an even more turbulent tempest." In the event of epic failure, Supreme Allied Commander and future president Dwight D. Eisenhower drafted a handwritten message to be read in the event that D-Day failed. Fortunately, he never read it.
Eisenhower Memorial
The reason why Wolfenstein 3D exists.
On the off chance that you can't read that, here it is:
"Our landings in the Cherbourg-Havre area have failed to gain a satisfactory foothold and I have withdrawn the troops. My decision to attack at this time and place was based on the best information available. The troops, the air and the Navy did all that bravery and devotion to duty could do.
If any blame or fault attaches to the attempt it is mine alone."
Getty
"On the plus side, James Bond will have two villains."
The Most Chilling Part:
His opener ("Our landings in the Cherbourg-Havre area have failed to gain a satisfactory foothold") was more or less the easy way of saying that thousands of Allied forces had died, there would be no second front in Europe and that Hitler and his asshole friends were probably laughing their asses off.
What Hearing It Would Have Meant:
Stephen E. Ambrose examined this possibility in his essay "D Day Fails: Atomic Alternatives in Europe." Had the D-Day invasion gone so poorly that Eisenhower would have been prompted to read that speech, he would have "certainly lost his job," and "the Churchill government could not have survived -- after all, it had bet the kingdom on Overlord" (which was the code name for the invasion). Meanwhile in the U.S., "Roosevelt -- who had also bet the house on Overlord -- would have been secure from a no-confidence vote. But he had a presidential election coming up in five months ... He would have lost the election."
".. .and the wheelchair you rode in on."
Churchill, Roosevelt and Eisenhower would all have their impressive careers cut short, which, holy crap we couldn't have handled, like as a planet. Those three were some of the last people in the world who actually seemed to have their shit together. Ambrose concluded that WWII would have ended one of two ways in Europe: with President Thomas E. Dewey authorizing the use of atomic bombs over European cities, or...
"... a communist victory in Europe. A Communist Germany, France, Low Countries and Italy would have meant no NATO and a possibility of Communist Great Britain. Relations with the Soviet Union would have been impossibly difficult and dangerous. That is a terrible prospect -- but it might have happened if the Germans had beaten us on the beaches of Normandy."
Just like that.
I heard a really cool radio broadcast featuring that letter regarding Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin. The dialogue was between the two while on the moon after everything, including contact with NASA control, had failed. It ended with that letter being read. I thought it was quite powerful.
ReplyThat picture of Nixon smiling in front of the flag. So f*****g Quagmire.
ReplyI totally thought that the last entry would be about the BBC script prepared in case of nuclear attack: "There is nothing to be gained by trying to get away." Absolutely chilling. (link is bitly slash sTqDOe)
Replyrussia? won WWII?! Oh russia, you poor, ignorant, backwards country. When will you recover from the dark ages, which is what i believe they call the last 200 years of living in russia.
ReplyTrolls at least plan their attack. There wasn't even a modicum of thought in this whole comment.
"Article say Russia. HULK SMASH RUSSIA!!!"
Imagine being Kennedy's speech writer and knowing you were writing the script to the end of the world. Try to put yourself in that position. For me, it's an example of why history is both fascinating and terrifying.
ReplyNot gonna check 686 comments to see if anyone already said this. If not:
ReplyThese aren't really speeches as such but search Wikipedia for Britain's "Letters of Last Resort". Scarier than waking up next to Barbara Streisand.
The state of Georgia would like to issue a statement: "Fuck Sherman."
ReplyThe ghost of William T. Sherman would like a word.
The ghosts of 10 million Africans who died being transported to the Southern colonies because the people there thought it would be funny would like to issue a statement: "Fuck Georgia"
It would seem that there is a modern day crisis unfolding in the middle east. Global dominance is the goal. World War 3 may happen in 2012. Nato is covertly orchestrating it. iranisrealwarpossible2011 . blogspot. com/
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesI've talked to people like you. When doomsday fails to pass, instead of reevaluating your world view, there's a 99% chance you'll just move doomsday to next yet. And so on, until you inevitably perish and the next generation takes the paranoia torch.
I bet NoobSaibot90's a big Harold Camping fan.
Tell you what...If the world ends, I'll buy you a mutant cow steak in the remains and toast you're reveation.
The word "apocalypse" actually means "to unveil". Just thought I'd throw that out there.
"And I'll go into people's houses at night and wreck up the place! Hoo-hoo-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" Futurama Nixon kicks ass!
ReplyWell I think Nixon's petty breaking and entering is kinda like Al Capone's Tax Evasion. Everyone knew Capone did all sorts of stuff, and even the people that liked him started hating him after the St. Vaentine's Day Massacre, but Tax evasion was the only thing anyone could actually prove he did, so that's what they went after him for.
ReplyWow. Just the thought of the moon landing ending in tragedy and everything it would imply makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry. I'm gonna go watch the (successful) moon landing a few dozen times now until I feel better.
ReplyWhat's this? No retarded conspiracy theories or trolls in reply yet? I applaud you, Cracked readers.
This time.
Those PSA's reminded me of the Simpsons episode where Comic Book guy handed over his shop to Bart and Milhouse.
ReplyNot to mention those victory speeches by Al Gore and John Kerry.
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesThe title is "6 Terrifying Speeches", not "6 Speeches That Would've Potentially Prevented Eleven Years of Political Nonsense"
Lol, we're being political on a comedy website
Too bad, I was expecting a JFK speech denying he had sexual relations with Marilyn Monroe. Imagine what Slick Willy said but with JFK's accent.
If you want a TERRIFYING speech then how bout Nader's acceptance speech?
I chose to bang Marylin Monroe in this decade and do the other things. Not because they were easy, but because they were hard.
@Bas
No, no...
"I chose to do Marilyn Monroe and other women in this decade. Because they were easy, and I was hard."
"I not only had sexual relations with that woman, I had sexual relations with several of her hot actress friends, a bevy of models, some dames in the secretary pool, a couple interns, and, occasionally, my super-hot wife. Kennedy AWAAAAAAAAAY!"
This is your president: John Henry E*cough* sorry Dwight David Eisenhower.
ReplyNo one wants the Robot Prez.
Note: Do you know who Bethesda's first choice for JHE's VA was? Former President Bill Clinton.
I like how in Eisenhower's note he first wrote 'troops have been withdrawn' then crossed that out and replaced with 'I have withdrawn the troops'.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesEisenhower was a class act.
Passive vs. active voice. A good leader knows that active voice is stronger.
I really admire General Ike. He was a great man.
@June 6, 1944, the date of the Normandy invasion during World War II, is often marketed as the turning point of the 20th century@
Reply Hide All See All 44 RepliesActually by the 1944 the WWII was already won by Soviets (crucial moment - battle of Stalingrad after which Reich never recovered), so outside US it is widely regarded that US landed only to grab their part of land and fame from the already beaten to death Nazis. So really landing was not about Reich but about stopping glorious communist armies, stealing their hard-won victory from the fingers of the half-dead Germany (Iam sorry but its true).
Actually, we teach that here as well. Except we weren't racing the Soviets, we were racing the Brits. Basically, we both had crazy generals.
Really? What were the Russians doing to Czechoslovakia, Hungary and Poland after the war? Were they having their vacations? Besides, the USSR was helped by US lend-lease items.
Actually main portion of lend-lease was shipped after the lowest point of war (which was the winter of 1941) and helped greatly... but after the Nazi invasion plan turned into epic fail. It is really sad for Americans but the war was won at the gates of Moscow hy the untrained unequipped but very very very angry Russian conscripts. All your fancy bling-bling came after that when the fate of Reich was sealed by the blood of the Great Russian Nation. Its an old Russian tradition to kick German asses - in the last 300 years we stormed Berlin for 3 times, one time for the century.
Not really. Stalin kept pushing (nagging) for the Allies to "open the Western Front" years before 1944 when they weren't even close to being ready. He knew that it was crucial for the Germans to have their resources split to make things easier for the Eastern Front. Also, Stalin seriously feared that the Allies would make a separate peace with Hitler which would have made WW2 in Europe basically Germany vs the USSR. It's not accurate to simply say the Soviets would have won for sure. ANything could have happened (read Fatherland).
Although, there was serious consideration about who would influence Europe after Germany was defeated. And Churchill was pissed when he realized that post WW2 Europe would basically be US/USSR controlled.
Overlord was also more about us Brits as well. You gotta remember we didn't really like being so close to the enemy for 4 years
You see, even the initial attack on Soviet Union was s total madness, but after failing the Blitzkrieg plan (when German troops were forced to continue war in winter - welcome to Frostland fuckers) even Jesus Christ himself couldnt win war for Reich. And in 1944, when Stalin got big, expirienced, well-trained and well-equipped army, even if US changed sides and joined Reich, Germany was lost. Yeah American landing made things a little easier - I wont argue with that - but even without Americans Reich would fallen in 1945. Maybe it costed us more, but when you already lost 26 MILLIONS it makes no differences. It's became not about efforts, losses, your funny expedition forces - it became about I WILL RIP YOUR CHEST APART AND EAT YOUR HEART YOU BLOODY GERMAN BASTARD (literally - you lucky you didnt read Russian frontline propaganda of the age, that was best hate-speeches ever, "Kill the Germans. Kill all of them, old, young, thin, fat, healthy, sick - all of them" - famous Soviet poet Erenburg).
About consideration - yes, but I cant find words "fighting nazis" in "we want to control post-war Europe".
So, basically, all that D-DAY was about "Me too! Me too defeated Germany!"
Oh I found it
"The Germans are not human beings. Henceforth the word German means to us the most terrible curse. From now on the word German will trigger your rifle. We shall not speak any moe. We shall not get excited. We shall kill. If you have not killed at least one German a day, you have wasted that day... If you cannot kill your German with a bullet, kill him with your bayonet. If there is calm on your part of the front, if you are waiting for the fighting, kill a German before combat. If you leave a German alive, the German will hang a Russian and rape a Russian woman. If you kill one German, kill another - there is nothing more amusing for us than a heap of German corpses. Do not count days; do not count miles. Count only the number of Germans you have killed. Kill the German - this is your old mother's prayer. Kill there German - this is what your children beseech you to do. Kill the German - this is the cry of your Russian earth. Do not waver. Do not let up. Kill." - that was written in the time of Battle of Stalingrad, when people LITERALLY were fighting in close combat with teeths and nails.
And TWO YEARS after THAT you guys showing up, all merry and ready to fight Nazis. LOL.
no one denies russia's MASSIVE contribution, one bigger than america's.
but this idea that the russia could have easily won without is just as ridiculous as saying america won the whole war. both sides were needed for a quick victory.
Russia didnt won easily. But won. And when your help arrived, the day was already done. Do not think. Kill. "Oh, hi guys, I'am Johnny, fresh from the Normandy, why are such long faces? Did I missed something?"
People seem to have forgotten that without the d-day victory, the Nazi's could have relocated their forces to the East front and possibly have a chance against the Russians.
Russia could have one the war singlehandedly? Jacopo got burned for suggesting somewhat close in another article. Think about it, Germany attacking Russia looked like some chihuahua attacking a pitbull with the pitbull getting pawned!.
3/4 of the German losses were lost on the Eastern Front, so please tell where were exactly those Huge German Forces Defetead By Americans That Could Change Everything?
pro-tip: Germans were viewing Eastern Front assigment as a form of punishment and Western front assigment - as a blessing.
And I dont suggest anything - there are huge fields of death in my country, filled with hundreds of thousands fallen soldiers, died in a fierce, unhuman battle. And where were you when they were dying and fighting and spitting blood? You waited. You were afraid. You known that in entire human history there were no battle like Stalingrad - and you didnt want a piece of it. Deep inside all you Americans know that your nation never expirienced such suffering that were in the occupied Russia and that pain and hatred of this unhuman proportion (26 millions - in all your wars you didnt lost even tenth of it) will destroy your heart and your soul.
But we survived. Remained humans. And ever kept the ability to read your comedy sites and laugh.
hey guys? the word the article uses is "marketed". as in that's why marketers say, not what really happened. im just sayin tho.
"But we survived. Remained humans. "
Remained human? Reading that propaganda up there about killing all Germans doesn't seem to imply that you kept your humanity. People condemn the Nazis for attempting to exterminate an entire race, but judging by your own words you were just as bad as they were.
I don't want to sound too American sided but the USSR was in deep trouble when one enemy attacked, never mind a small one while the USA participated on two fronts. Can you really tell me that Russia could have finished, in a fast manner, the Germans?
Fun fact - that badass propaganda was written by a Soviet jew (who then was touring in US, raising money for the Russian front). So even our jews werent silent victims of Nazis... it's like Inglorious Bastards, only in reality and with a much more cruelty.
In Russia we dont whine or wait for help - we just kill bastards. And about fast manner without American help - 26 millions and 4 years of war is a fast manner for you? You're joking, right?
@jericoparazo
The US got off easy in comparison. Yes, they were on two fronts, but those theaters were much less brutal than the eastern front.
There was nothing Germany could do to repel the Soviet forces. At that point the Soviet churned out war machines and soldiers at an insane rate, and the remnants of the German forces, even if unified couldn't have done anything but delayed the Soviets somewhat.
BUT: The US still saved Europe. From the Soviets, just like the article said. The Germans were particularly lucky, since the Soviets did... horrible things to the civilians (well over 90% of Berlin's women were raped... multiple times. They weren't any kinder to the Jews, for that matter).
But, Mr.Russia, this whole series of post were unnecessary. Look at the line you took offense to: "June 6, 1944, the date of the Normandy invasion during World War II, is often MARKETED as the turning point of the 20th century."
Marketed. Can you really deny that?
For that matter, it's true. The allies prevented the CCCP from pushing deeper into Europe, which is something I'm very, very thankful for, spared a lot of lives, and THEN helped out a devastated Europe (yeah, I know the Soviet helped out eastern Europe too, but they didn't have a lot to give, so their help consisted more of putting nearly everyone to work in the fields.)
About mass raping - that was form of putting Germans (who as you surely remember ELECTED Hitler, hooray for democracy!) to justice. When you kill 26 millions of people (2/3 of whom were civilians), rape is almost a mercy. I know that Americans have no precedent of such terror in their history so they cannot understand that level of pain and hatred that was in souls of Russian soldiers when they reached Germany. Russians had full rights not to rape - to destroy all German people, kill'em all. But we were merciful and let them to live.
About working in fields - actually USSR had their own trade league through which it supported communist countries. Big part of eastern european industries was built on the Soviet money.
I still believe that the USSR would have had a lot more trouble defeating Germany w/o an western front...You forget the Americans and Brits were coming from Italy as well. And w/o Hitler being all scared of Allied forces in the west he could have setup a better defensive strategy against the Soviets...Sorry Bro Its true. take it. :)
"About mass raping - that was form of putting Germans (who as you surely remember ELECTED Hitler, hooray for democracy!)to justice. When you kill 26 millions of people (2/3 of whom were civilians), rape is almost a mercy."
First of all, Hitler's votes consisted of about 3% before the Great Depression, after the crisis it shot up to 18%. Jews were just the scapegoats, we always need to blame someone or a group when something bad happens. Add massive propaganda and an extremist to the mix and it's what you get. I don't think I need to give you the definition of propaganda.
Second of all, I'd like you to remind you you're justifying rape here, some people don't take that s**t lightly and would rather die. Besides I don't remember German civilians storming Leningrad in my history books, I don't think you do neither.
The USSR and the US both saved our european asses, that's how the story went. Yes the IIIrd Reich didn't learn to never attack Russia during winter in history class and got their panzer asses kicked by angry russians straight to Berlin, and yes Normandy was an epic theater of war that changed everything. So y'now what f**k all of this, what's done has been done, let's drink!
There are important German history school that teaches about Sonderwerg - Special Way Of German Civilization - that was leading to Hitler, so Hitler is not a mistake or anomaly but the pinnacle of the German national history. After all, first mass atrocities was done by Germans in First World War, their murderous rage in Second WW was just an escalation.
About rapes - well there were surprisingly little number of German women suicides. Maybe they all never had any honour (which is unexpected cause all Nazi teaching was about Not Sleeping With Enemy) or maybe brutal, smelling of death, anger and dominance Russian soldiers were pretty good lovers, who knows. Germans invented BDSM porn, after all.
And about American participation - you may believe in anything, but that a matter of fact (pretty shameful for US), not a matter of faith.
And yes, lets drink! Iam not an a*****e and actually hate USSR, but I like nice, anger-fueled chit-chat with our American and European friends.
Really, anything can change in history. If the Normandy invasions failed, then the Germans could have relocated more troops to the Eastern Front. That one fourth more troops might not sound bad until you realize it is millions upon millions of reinforcements with more armor and air power thrown in as well. Russia was already low on supplies (I can't confirm this through independent research, but I learned in, admittedly American, history classes that often the Russians only had one rifle per two people, leaving one holding the rifle and some ammo, and another with most of the ammo who was supposed to pick up a rifle from a fallen comrade if he found one and use it).
And the Germans didn't like the Eastern Front because, without a doubt, the Russians DID fight more viciously than the other assorted allies, and also had much more hate harbored towards the Germans, although both sides contributed heavily to the overall ending of the war.
I think it's worth noting that the French coast and the surrounding area was the launching area for the V1 and V2 rockets (the latter of which was literally the first ICMB).
Had the Normandy invasion not happened, these bases could have been used (and improved) for use against Soviet forces in the East as they advanced. The German Ardennes Offensive of '44 also basically used up what Germany had left in reserve of honest to goodness troops
My only humble point is that the Normandy landings, while certainly not decisive, did make the Wehrmacht use resources and men (occupation and combat forces) that could have been used in the East. I doubt this would have had a major impact on the advancing Soviets, but it might have altered the particulars of how the East would have played out. Just a humble opinion.
I heard that quadrotriticale and scotch whiskey were also invented in Russia!
Mr. Russia, please note that you personally were not actually in the battle of Stalingrad, nor did you fight in WWII, nor did you assault berlin at any point in your life. The only thing you're being proud of right now is the accident of you being born a Russian.
Add that to the fact that you're saying raping german civillians in WWII was alright eventhough they did not nescesarily have anything to do with the nazis, and the fact that you're obviously discriminating against germans eventhough current ones also have nothing to do with the nazis, that makes you a prettty s****y person.
Mr Russia, wasn't the USSR on the sides of the Germans? Why should the Allies trust it fully? Another example on the weaknesses of the USSR, it almost got pawned by a little country it was attacking that time, Finland.
@Karri-I think the Pacific front was quite brutal. The Japanese were diehards who really took the "fighting to the last man" literally. Also, the Russians also lost to Finland, a small country. This means that Russia was weak. This was because of infrastructure and, initially, officers more competent with ass kissing than fighting.
War with Finland was won and USSR got new territories. More intresting that the only thing that stopped Soviet troops was English demands to stop the war immediatly with possibility to turning it into a full-scale war with British Empire. There were already created a Soviet goverment for Finland but it was recalled after British demands. So you better learn history before making up nonsense.
And about hatred for Germans... well, I'am confused. That guys started two f*****g World Wars killed in them more than 30 millions of Russian people (that's like FIVE TIMES Holocaust, yep), why Russians would ever dislike Germans? I think, it's just a strange Russian prejudece.
Mr Russia, I said "almost lost" the war to Finland. Almost lost a war with a country a fraction of its size. Well, they did have Simo Hayha so I guess its understandable.
Besides, war with Finland was initiated because, intially, the USSR AND GERMANY WERE ON THE SAME SIDE!
Last one to comment. So does that mean I win the discussion?;)
I dont understand thesis "almost lost" - finns defeated Soviet armies? USSR was on the verge of collapse? Thousands of finns troops occupied Leningrad and were advancing to Moscow? Or what? "Yeah, sure, USSR defeated Reich, but almost lost to Finland" - you cant be serious.
Mr. Russia, "almost lost" meaning the Finns won but fought hard and cost Mother Russia a lot of troops and equipment. I think its partly through the Finns using innovative tactics like hit and run using ski troops.
Sorry, I mean the Finns lost but cost Mother Russia Dearly.
you wish russia. You certainly didnt end WWII, or even help. All you did was prevent the nazis from invading, but you did nothing to help other countries, especially the usa. What about your cold war immedietly after? Cuban missle crisis? Your shiity economy and horribly failing political structure? Cmon...russia, dont be a douchbag. You know America is the greatest country evr ever ever ever.
Superjesus, I'm not American but I have to agree. I just read the plaque on a building on my school saying it was built with the help of the USA to help my country to get up after WW2. A school that was started by the USA to give chance to not so rich people a chance to get a decent college education. My grandad (RIP) fought with Americans at Bataan and was rewarded with medals and, more importantly, scholar ship for my mom (my grandad was a tenant farmer and wasn't exactly that rich).
France would like a word, Mr.Russia.
Why dont you mention how Russia doomed half of Nazi occupied Europe to another 40 yrs of occupation, oppression, and hardship? America liberated nations, Russia invaded them.
Russia, you attempted to take over Finland twice in WWII, AND FAILED TERRIBLY BOTH TIMES. Mighty and glorious my ass, you got ass-whipped twice by a few guys on skis with outdated gear.
Holy Sh!t!!! The replies to this comment alone are longer than most comment pages.
OK Mr. Russia every time you show up on a comments page all you do is just wave Russia's dick in everyone's face. WE GET IT YOU'RE RUSSIAN. Not like we couldn't tell from your username. s**t the way you tell history you'd think Russia singlehandedly won every single battle of every single war, invented the lightbulb and airplane, wrote all of Shakespeare's plays, and built the pyramids. And hate to break it to you but there's a reason it's World War II not Russo-German War. Millions of German troops were tied up in both Italy and later France due to the Allied invasion there. And yes in invasion of Italy WAS at a crucial moment as Hitler transferred thousands of troops and vehicles from Kursk to stop it. And in case you're forgetting (as most tend to do) there was a war in the Pacific as well. Russia didn't do s**t there until a month before their surrender. How's that for a late entry?
@a floating symbol of death for all humankind@
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesDont be so dramatic - only for the capitalist part of Mankind.
How's that Communism working for you? That's right, you can't even keep your people fed, you pinko fuck.
Breaking news! Breaking news! Communism fell in Russia 20 years ago.
Just so you know; Russia isn't communist anymore. It may also interest you to know that Men have landed on the moon, they made a sequel to Star Wars, videogames come in higher than 16 bit and it's possible to talk to people on the other side of the world useing "Electric Mail", or "E-mail".
So, you're not communist but you're also not included in the capitalist part of mankind? What do you do, just stand around all day watching the snow turn into mud? That sounds like a horrible way to run a country...you should be ashamed.
When American Brains Are Jammed, lol. You know, besides capitalism and communism there are other social concepts on this planet.
There are also more countries in the world besides Russia and the U.S.
If #1 had happened, we'd live in the 1950s themed post-apocalyptic wasteland of the Fallout universe... "I don't want to set the world on fire..."
ReplyI know they arent american,but number 1 reminds me of the british PSA/PIFs called "Protect and Surive" done in the mid 70s instructing you on what to do in case of a nuclear attack.They were never broadcasted,thankfully,but they are now in the public domain,and are available in youtube.Nothing says impending doom like being instructed by a stern british voice and creepy and kitsch animation on how to wrap up your dead loved ones in plastic and taking them out side of your fallout shelter.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesI've seen that on YouTube, it's pretty freaky
Wow, I just watched them on YouTube, it's really creepy....
Dear Lord. I watched two of those videos and couldn't watch anymore. I was a kid in the 80's and don't miss that fear at all.
There's a short movie made about #5, called "In Event of Moon Disaster".
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesThere's also an audio drama called "Moon Graffiti".
There's also a meal at Denny's called "Moon over My Hammy".
ZCalo221, you had me in tears over that one. You win +5 internets!