6 TV Shows You Won't Believe Saved People's Lives
Think about the biggest way television has enriched your life. Got it? Even if you came up with something like "raised me" or "first glimpse of titties," the people in this article have you beat. Their answer to that prompt would be "saved it." Here are six silly shows that have somehow prevented someone from having an untimely tango with the Grim Reaper.

If you've seen American Idol, the singing-based talent show that featured Simon Cowell on a panel of judges, then you've seen The X Factor. It's a singing-based talent show that features Simon Cowell on a panel of judges. In England.

Truly a jack of all trades.
In 2007, 46-year-old Jacqui Gray was one of many contestants in the fourth season of The X Factor. Like most talent show contestants, she had little in the way of actual talent. After smirking throughout her entire performance, Cowell asked Gray the patronizing question, "You have a very weird sounding voice, are you aware of that?" Both he and fellow judge Sharon Osborne suggested that she see a throat specialist, saying that it sounded like "somebody else is in there".

"Like a midget or something."
Displaying what has to be the world's least attuned sarcasm detector, Gray decided to take the advice of the judges and see a throat specialist. It was then that the doctor diagnosed her with bronchiectasis -- a potentially fatal lung disease that can cause irreversible damage to the bronchial tubes if you have it, or attempt to pronounce it. Had the condition not been caught in time, doctors noted that Gray's lungs would have been "more infected and full of bacteria than Ke$ha's lady parts."

Not a direct quote.
Gray now takes medication for her condition and thanks Simon Cowell for saving her life. You know, a near-death experience often gives someone a new lease on life, inspiring them to put effort into something meaningful and worthwhile. And after her brush with death, Jacqui Gray has decided t ... audition for more reality shows.
Forgive us if we don't quite feel like giving Simon Cowell a medal for this one.

In 2004, Juan Catalan was a man with a problem. His brother was in jail for a drive-by shooting, and the 16-year-old girl who had testified against him had been murdered. That was when Catalan found himself in jail as Suspect Number 1 in the homicide investigation.

Above: The face of a murderer? Or the face of the one guy at your local bus station who doesn't sell seedy pot?
Fortunately, he had an airtight alibi: He and his 6-year-old daughter had been at a Dodgers game at the time of the murder. He even had the ticket stubs to prove it, and surely videos of the televised game would exonerate him. Plus, he offered to take a lie detector test, just for good measure. Case closed, right?
Not quite. It turned out the ticket stubs weren't compelling-enough evidence, no footage of him and his daughter could be found, and the police refused to allow him to take that lie detector test. So how did Juan Catalan end up as the luckiest accused murderer this side of O.J.?

By burning his gloves, like a responsible fucking villain?
What Did a TV Show Have to Do With This?
On the day of the murder, HBO was also at the Dodgers game filming scenes for the show Curb Your Enthusiasm. The episode in question revolved around Larry David hiring a prostitute so he could drive in the carpool lane on the way to the game.
After hours of scouring the HBO footage, Catalan's lawyers found a shot of him and his daughter eating hot dogs and presumably not murdering anyone in the stands behind Larry David.

The video also had time codes showing exactly when they were in the stadium, proving there was no way Catalan could have committed the murder. After five and a half months in prison, Catalan was released back into the world, and the plots of Curb Your Enthusiasm and Law and Order: Los Angeles went back to existing only on TV.

In October 2007, a British woman named Beth Cordingly was feeling like shit, if that shit was very, very sick. She had persistent headaches and drowsiness and couldn't stop throwing up. Her only solace was watching her favorite soap opera, Hollyoaks, in between throw-up sessions.

The title card actually shows much more than you need to know.
Hollyoaks, for those of you who are a little dusty in your British soap opera knowledge, is one of the U.K.'s most popular soaps. It's kind of like Saved by the Bell: The College Years, in that the stories revolve around the mischief-making of young students at a community college. If Community and Melrose Place had a drunken one-night stand, Hollyoaks would be their unwanted bastard baby.

What Did a TV Show Have to Do With This?
As Cordingly was lying on her sick bed, Hollyoaks aired an episode in which the following completely plausible scenario occurred:
- Spoiled rich girl Jessica needed her boiler fixed.
- An inexperienced repairman fixed it by stuffing newspaper into the boiler, because he's also inexperienced in tthe ways of paper and hot things.
- Jessica threw a house party, presumably to celebrate her newly repaired boiler.
- Everyone got sick from carbon monoxide poisoning.
As the episode wore on, Cordingly began to notice that the symptoms of the drunken revelers mirrored her own, minus the makeout sessions and slutty dancing.
She headed to the hospital to get a check-up, where nurses probably laughed off her concerns that she had "the thing from the telly." But when the doctor checked her out, he discovered that she most definitely had carbon monoxide poisoning. The kicker? Her doctor said that had she stayed in the house another 24 hours she'd be dead.
In the wake of the story, doctors informed the public that soap operas are still not a good source of medical advice and that they should continue to use WebMD.com when diagnosing themselves with something life-threatening.

"Oh God, it's AMNESIA!"








There's one thing wrong in this article that I can notice, the Spongebob kid did not "put his arm around him (Andrew) just as he had seen Larry the lobster lifeguard do with SpongeBob."
ReplyI just saw this episode, and Larry actually didn't put his arm around the drowning fish at all. He just lifted the drowning fish out of the water with one hand, and paddle back with the other. Seems like that bit was added to make the story more incredible or something.
I firmly believe that Mythbusters saves dozens of lives every year. That 'don't do this at home' statement at the beginning is TOTALLY something kids listen to.
ReplyWell, during Mythubsters they had one person die off-screen (Erik Gates), so I guess they're still positive 2-1.
ReplyThe guy died at a construction site at his own work, not on Mythbusters.
Im swimming in a lake thats underwater: f**k logic.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesUnderwater lakes are actually a thing, but they're not tar pits as seen in Spongebob. They're caused by really big air bubbles, and there's a remarkable one in the Gulf of Mexico.
Underwater lakes actually exist, but they're not tar pits like in Spongebob.
Underwater lakes are actually Brine.
I remember seeing that episode of mythbusters lol and spongebob, it just goes to show you don't doubt people lol
ReplyI always remembered that poster too, and the heimlich machine. I was told it was important in school but never actually shown it so they were all I had to go on. Never had to use it though luckily
ReplyIt's also important to try slapping the person on the back first, as being less likely to damage them and quite likely to work.
"Oh God, it's AMNESIA!" ...AGAIN.
ReplyWhy is Mythbusters #1? It's not that surprising to learn life-saving techniques and information on a show about science.
ReplyFirst of all, Cracked articles are not in any specific order (most likely due to the kind of differences of opinion that you just showed us an example of) other than the way the author feels like writing it. Secondly, if there was any reason why that was the last entry, it was probably just that Mythbusters had two stories and the others only had one.
Oh wow, I never expected to see a picture of an Omani water truck in Cyclone Gonu on Cracked. Well done on scouring the bizarre depths of what people upload to google images.
ReplyThe kids in number 2 and 3 need to be tested to see if they're some kind of geniuses are something.
ReplySwear to God, I saw that same episode of SpongeBob and I wouldn't be able to remember that stuff and save a jersey woman and her kid's life.
Mythbusters makes sense... the others on the other hand, do not
ReplyA few years ago in an issue of New Moon Magazine, I read something about a girl who learned the hemlich maneuver from watching SpongeBob, and used it to save her friend from choking on her gum. When I have kids, I'm gonna make them watch SpongeBob.
Replyp-p-p-p-penis pump
Replythere was an article when I was younger, about a kid who gave his choking friend abdominal thrusts after he saw it on "Hey Arnold!".
ReplyI'm surprised it wasnt on there. great article though.
OH GOD, ITS AMNESIA.
Replyjust completely awesome
"more infected and full of bacteria than Ke$ha's lady parts." hahaha hahaha
Replyseriously decent article even if it wasn't by Soren ;)& i love spongebob! :)
elitist much?
If only people remembered that you can float on your damn back and rest for a minute, fewer of them would drown. Of course if you're in the ocean with waves throwing you around and crashing over you it's not much help, but in a lake or other still body of water it works.
ReplyAfter having been rescued from Lake Huron by a 67yo man I can tell you that your advice is worth exactly nothing to someone who is panicking.
My cousin was once almost drowned in a waist-deep water. He panicked when he lost his footing.
Think that the writer of this hates England cuz the two British TV shows picked there don't represent us too well ... "Acting" in Hollyoaks is akin to "Acting" in adult movies lol. The X-Factor is just an irritating excuse for semitalented f**kwits to get there 15 minutes by skipping all the actual hard work and training most talented musicians do to get famous, by raping the minds of millions of veiwers every Saturday night for three months, losing out on Xmas Number one because of Facebook and then appearing on I'm a Celebrity three years later to try and boost their spiralling career.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesCrumpets and Beckham worshipping was a bit weak. At least you didn't mention the Queen though eh?
He's Australian. We're all descended from your prison folk so our bitter, twisted natures are hardly our fault. But seriously, when you say "picked" do you realise that this article is about TV shows that actually did, in real life, save real peoples lives with the information presented on said TV show? I don't think the author planned all of these things out to include s**tty British shows... Unless he did plan it. Then that's even creepier.
I would like to point out that an awful lot of the current Australians are of Irish descent because of the British coming over here (Ireland) and stuffing the Irish off to Australia to prison. So because of the Brits, Australia has a hell of a lot of Irish in it.
@Sidmondo - hahaha, You know what is hilarious? When people think anyone else gives a solitary s**t about the origin of Australian people. No one cares if Australians are descended from prisoners... even australians themselves. No one has cared for several hundred years.
I was going to skip this article, but "Oh, god it's AMNESIA." made it all worth it.
Replymythbusters ftw
Reply