And You Thought Fast Zombies Were The Worst Kind... [COMIC]

Jonathan Wojcik writes articles for us too. You can find more of his work at BogLeech.com.

Jonathan Wojcik writes articles for us too. You can find more of his work at BogLeech.com.
273 Comments
Now do the sharks fire laser beams from their eyes as well?
ReplyFrickin' laser beams, no less.
Even if zombies were real, I don't get how shooting them in the head, or otherwise destroying their brain, is the only way to kill them. Think about it, regardless of what they are, their muscles/bodies wouldn't be able to function without blood and oxygen. Without those, you simply cannot move your muscles. Same goes for the brain; the brain needs blood and oxygen to function. Therefore, if you just cause enough damage to its body for it to bleed out, it should still die.
ReplyUsually the comics here are kind of "meh," but I though this was hysterical
Replyfunny s**t
ReplyWould someone please explain the joke to me. Also, I was hoping to see everyone's own special tactic for killing zombies.
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesIt's a 'kind of zombie' joke. Everyone says to shoot zombies in the head, because that's what all of the zombie movie heroes do. This is I think a slight 'shove it' to people thinking that zombies are real, or would be real, or would be like they are in the films... look, it doesn't have the same kick when you have to explain it, and anyway, this is my interpretation.
Everything is worse with sharks.
The explanation is to crawl back under your rock, where did you get the internet from anyway?
Zombie sharks?
these guys should be the survivors in Left4Dead 3
ReplyWhy do headshots kill zombies?
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesUh... uz the brain is the contol center
That makes sense. I've found that destroying the brain also works on living beings too.
all in all kibble the idea of the typical movie zombie is that is has a disease similar in effect to rabies in that it takes control of the being's nerve center which is the brain and killing zombies is, as with killing rabid animals, the easiest way is by removing, damaging, or destroying said nerve center
thing is, the part of the brain that just controls hunger, movement and basic "animal instincts" is very small, where brain meets spinal cord. Most of the brain would be expendable to something like a "real" zombie.
I get the joke. It's just so lame...
ReplyGuys, guys... more important question... why is the girl's SOLE piece of effective armor apparently intended to prevent HER from biting the Zombies??
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesCrazy goths are grazy brah. I know one lass we deemed the cockvampire.
She was also drooling. I wonder...
She's a goth, she's really just protecting her eyeshadow.
Who says the mask is for bite prevention? Just by noting her crazed appearance and blatant fixation with death I could detect a possible penchant for necrophilia. Meaning that, for all we know, the mask could have been drawn to prevent her giving one of the zombies a fellatio.
You don't shoot for the head, you slice it off...
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesThat's vampires you idiot.
No, you stab vampires in the heart.
ugh don't you know? vampires can't be killed because they're shiny diamond people.
and decapitation works on zombies too.
Remove the head, or destroy the brain. With Romero zombies the head stays alive if decapitated, same for Max Brooks zombies.
And vampires also die if you cut off their heads. In pretty much everything but Twilight.
with vampires you stab the heart with a wooden stake, cut off the head, and put garlic flowers in its mouth
You're lying..somehow.....
ReplyWait Wait hold the damn phone!!..... Girl zombie nerds exists i thought they were bed time stories like the tooth fairy and shaq!
Reply Hide All See All 6 Repliesyes, only men are ever interested in pop-culture phenomena.
Zombie fangirl! *raises hand*
At TuesdayS., I think I love you.
Zombie (and ninja!) fangirl #2! *highfives other zombie fangirl* :D
You're on the internet, of course they exist. We all love zombies. This is the same medium that led to the proliferation of the unbelievably awesome Dr McNinja.
The world is full of amazing things, who knows, maybe there are even feminine feminists out there.
I would be more afraid of the zombie that knew how to use a weapon.
Reply Hide All See All 4 Repliesthen it would be nothing more than a common war with guns and s**t
you'd be more afraid of axe wielding zombie than shark vomitting zombie?
Bub in Day of the Dead used a gun to shoot a guy in the leg; then he got ripped in half and eaten. Choke on 'eeeeeeem!!!
That is not a zombie, that is a Ganado from Resident Evil 4. They can use weapons such as (in order of lethality): Axes, pitchforks, crossbows, chainsaws, crude riot shields, morningstars, gatling guns, and RPG's. Not to mention being able to plan, communicate, and if you shoot them in the head, then a worm the size of a python will grow out and start to bite you.
Zombie spewing sharks would be awesome. But evidently, a comic featuring them sucks ass.
Replythat's shark spewing zombie
Anyone else seethe giraffe with antanea in panel 8?
Reply:| Giraffes have horns.
Is.....is this guy serious? Have you ever seen a picture of a giraffe? I'm guessing so, seeing as how you correctly identified it as as a giraffe.
anybody else notice that "One guy still reading newspapers, experts confused" is written on the bottom of the newspaper
Replyyeah, i've been wondering when people would stop using that joke.
This makes no sense. First, a shark is defenseless out of the water. Second, the volume of the sharks suggest that they are heavily compressed in the digestive tract of the zombies, therefore they are dead, asphixiated. And thirdly, where do they get the sharks? Are they able to swim to get that full shark diet? What would they be doing out of the water then?
Reply Hide All See All 7 RepliesI leave you these interrogants.
you're right, why do people have to ruin material about zombies and people reading the paper with completely fictional, totally impossible s**t like sharks?
A wizard did it obviously.
f**k wizards! go take your 1d4 HP elsewhere!
The sharks are parasites who spread the zombie plague, obviously!
Linear warriors, quadratic wizards. Me an' my 1d4 HP can alter reality itself!
Man, DrNemmo, you ruined shark-vomiting zombies :(
They're amphibious shark gods from another dimension, who've opened some kind of mystical portal inside the zombie's stomach and esophagus, thereby turning those organs into magic satchels with infinite, unfathomable measures of space. Yes, I am high.
I paid $32.67 for a XBOX 360 and my mom got a 17 inch Toshiba laptop for $94.83 being delivered to our house tomorrow by FedEX. I will never again pay expensive retail prices at stores. I even sold a 46 inch HDTV to my boss for $650 and it only cost me $52.78 to get. Here is the website we using to get all this stuff, FullBids.com
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesI paid $4.83 to give your mom 17 inches, if you catch my drift.
this was the funniest response I've ever heard toward a spambot
Will this Toshiba help me fight shark-horking zombies? How heavy is it? Does it come with some kind of sling? I can think of literally hundreds of other objects that are better suited.
The other day, I saw a flyer for a real zombie club.
ReplyI saw one in all the highschools in my general area.
Why is guy guy with the chainsaw all dressed up in camo? I just noticed and it bugs me.
ReplyEverything he owns is camo anyway, he's one of *those* guys.