5 Horrific Serial Killers (Who Are Free Right Now)
We're not here to scare you. All we're saying is that many of the world's most terrifying serial killers are in fact roaming free, and could be outside your door right now.
Due to some legal loopholes and a system that's surprisingly forgiving of mass murderers, some true monsters have been cranked out onto the street. So the next time you go shopping, you may want to keep an eye out for...
#5.
Nikolai Dzhumagaliev
From:
Kazakhstan
Why You Don't Want to Meet Him:
Nikolai Dzhumagaliev is as close to a real life Hannibal Lecter as you can get. The main difference is that Dzhumagaliev has metal teeth.
Operating in 1980 in the former Soviet Union, Dzhumagaliev is one of the most prolific serial killer cannibals the country has ever seen. Affectionately called "Metal Fang" for the set of white, metal teeth which had replaced his own chompers (making himself a sort of hybrid between Lecter and Jaws from James Bond), Dzhumagaliev is said to have killed and eaten somewhere between 50 to 100 women... and even served a few portions to his unknowing friends.
"No, seriously, Nikolai, what is in this?"
No, we didn't make this guy up.
Why You Might Meet Him Anyway:
After being sentenced to a mental institution in Uzbekistan and escaping once, the government decided that less than 10 years of rehabilitation was enough for this serial killer and simply let him go.
"And you PROMISE you won't eat any more women?"
So Where Is He Now?
Very little is known of Dzhumagaliev's current whereabouts, though he is said to be living with his relatives in Eastern Europe. However, being a free man and all, he can travel anywhere he pleases. Perhaps a place where almost no one has heard of him. Like your town, for example.
It could be your neighbor.
Nikolai has always been described as a very charming and well-spoken man, and one not bad to look at to boot (which only helped him lure more women into his fridge). The Jaws teeth are, thankfully, a dead give away. But hey, he could totally blend in at a James Bond convention. Unless he keeps his mouth closed, in which case he could blend in anywhere at all. Your basement, for instance.
#4.
Karla Homolka
From:
Canada
Why You Don't Want to Meet Her:
Let's say you're a woman. And let's say that prior to your wedding, your husband-to-be expresses his one wish: He wants to rape your sister. If your immediate reaction is to help him do it, then you're probably Karla Homolka.
You!
When the sister died during the course of their adventure in unspeakable horror, Karla panicked, called the police and gave herself up.
Oh, wait, no. She and her husband decided to do it again, to another victim. And another. Thus we wound up with the terrifying husband and wife serial killer team of Karla Homolka and Paul Bernardo, whose rampage only ended when Karla was charged with two counts of manslaughter in 1993. She then held a "going away party" before going off to jail, possibly with an amusing cake decorated for the occasion.
Why You Might Meet Her Anyway:
As bad as Karla was, apparently her husband was worse. Despite a mountain of conflicting statements from Karla and Paul, she managed to get a plea bargain in exchange for rolling over on her man. She served 12 years in prison and was released in 2005.
So Where Is She Now?
In 2007, Homolka decided that the only place for her and her one-year-old son to live a normal life were the Antilles. So now, she can be anywhere in Cuba, Jamaica, Haiti, the Dominican Republic or Puerto Rico. You might think that Latin America is not the perfect place for a skinny Canadian blonde to hide but... we don't know how to finish that sentence.
What a monster.
Either way, if while vacation you spot a MILF in her late 30s and want to make sure she is not your type (you know, the raping-killer type), then just remember that the courts have denied Homolka the change of her name. So a quick "Hey Karla" shout-out should clear everything up. If she turns around, that will be your cue to try to break the 500 meter dash record.
#3.
Juha Valjakkala
From:
Sweden/Finland
Why You Don't Want to Meet Him:
On July 3, 1988, a then 22-year-old Juha Valjakkala stole a bike. He was spotted and chased by the owners of the bike, Sten Nilsson and his 15-year-old son Fredrik. The chase ended at a nearby cemetery where, cornered and facing a bike theft charge, Juha used the Grand Theft Auto method of avoiding misdemeanors: He shot the father and son to death.
Suddenly realizing he had just made his situation quite a bit worse, he thought one way to redeem himself would be by killing Sten's wife, too.
He was arrested a week later.
"You don't really get crime, do you?"
Why You Might Meet Him Anyway:
After an evaluation labeled him a psychopath (money well spent, Finland!), Juha escaped from prison four times (most recently in 2006). The legal system over there decided this was a pretty good indication that he was both reformed and cured of his psychopathy, and after serving 19 years of his life sentence the Finnish courts simply paroled him.
So Where Is He Now?
After being released, Juha did what any man in his position would do after spending almost 20 years in jail for brutal murder: he stole a car, drove recklessly through the streets and in a surprisingly specific type of crime, drove an unlicensed taxi. Seriously, the man was living GTA.
Even Niko's taxi was licensed, for Christ's sake.
This little stunt caused him a trip back to the slammer. But if you were just starting to feel safer about your planned vacation in Scandinavia, then we have some bad news for you. Juha is being released once again on February 2nd (so he may be free now, depending on what day you read this).
And given his apparent passion for automobiles--unlicensed taxis in particular--God only knows when the next cab you take will be driven by him.
"So, new in town? Why don't I show you our magnificent Swedish cemeteries."
When I was a kid I was told about Karla and Paul Bernardo so I would keep my curfew.
Replyand thaaat's enough internet for today, thanks a lot cracked! (google image searched Renee Hartevelt AT YOUR OWN RISK!)
ReplyNumber 5 is a perfect example of why Wikipedia sucks as a source - in the russian version of the article, it says Nikolay is still in a mental institution and has been kept there for the past 19 years. As of this moment, he is isolated from society in a special psychiatric hospital with barbed wire around the premises. For god's sake, do your research correctly.
ReplyIssei just makes me so Goddamn angry. Shame on the media for actually enabling that man and making him some kind of status. I feel terrible for that girl he killed, who got absolutely no justice at all, and her poor family that has to live with the knowledge that the man that killed and ate their daughter is being treated like a celebrity. Disgusting.
ReplyIt stuff like this that makes me have no faith in the justice system. Issei should have gotten the death penalty and have his corpse rocketed to the sun.
Justice
The description of Karla Homolka does no justice to how horrible they are. They kidnapped, tortured, raped and sodomized a 14 year old for days, while video taping it. Then they murdered her, chopped her up, encased her body parts in cement, and dumped her in a lake. Then they kidnapped a 15 year old to repeat the process as entertainment over the Easter holidays. There was never agreement on who actually killed the girls, though it doesn't make either one better than the other.
ReplyKarla only got 12 years for manslaughter because police needed her testimony in order to get Paul, who was also suspect but never charge as a serial rapist active in the area for several years. Canadians have long been angry over the ludicrousness light sentence Karla got and the revelation that a defense lawyer illegally withheld the location of the video tapes, which would have made any plea bargain unnecessary. I know it is only a Cracked article, but many people feel strongly enough about the case that anytime it seems Karla is shown any sympathy or given less of the blame than Paul, it will get their backs up. There is a very good reason Karla has had to seek name changes in order to make a go of in Canada and refuses to even try outside of french speaking Quebec.
> Dzhumagaliev is said to have killed and eaten somewhere between 50 to 100 women... and even served a few portions to his unknowing friends.
ReplyDid you actually read the very article you're citing? He literally says: "I always ate human meat alone and never gave it to anyone else"
Well, they wanted a list without Americans on it, but something tells me the bitching will commence as usual. Joking aside, what's with all this hatred toward Japan? I seriously doubt they're unanimously supporting this guy. Besides, serial killers becoming celebrities of sorts or achieving some sort of following is hardly exclusive to Japan; there's crazies in every country who think serial murderers are "cool" or "deep" or "misunderstood", but they only represent the unfortunate fringe of society. Yes, obviously, Sagawa represents an extreme in this phenomona and I'm not excusing it.
ReplyThere's a difference between getting fan letters in prison (or death row, as the case may be) and being a free man living the life of a small-time celebrity.
i wonder if any women would live in a 10 mile radius near issei
ReplyLet's all stop what we're doing and find these guys ASAP!
ReplyOkay, even if you don't support the death penalty in theory, in WHAT universe is it a good idea not to have SOME kind of life sentence? Seriously, Ecuador, WTF. I know you're trying to be all civilized and modern, but some people just cannot be let out into society, ever.
ReplyMost places do. Paul Bernardo ( Karla's husband, and the Canadian media's epitome of evil) for example, has been sentenced to life in prison (25 years in Canada) but has also been designated a dangerous offender, meaning that he can be (and likely will be) incarcerated indefinitely.
Because of the severity of Bernardo's crimes but lack of physical evidence, Karla's testimony was deemed necessary by prosecutors in order to put Bernardo away and offered Karla a plea deal, claiming she suffered battered wife syndrome. After the plea deal was made, video tapes Karla and Paul made of their crimes were found in the house (the defense attorney had withheld information about their hiding place for over a year). The issue of Karla's plea deal was not overlooked by the public, it is consistently considered one of the worst miscarriages of justice in Canadian history and is referred to as "The Deal with the Devil".
Since reading #1, I have 'Mein Teil' by Rammstein in my head. The case of Pedro Lopez unnerves the f**k out of me.
ReplyAt least with Armin Meiwes his victim was a willing volunteer. Of course, one wonders what would happen once he got a taste for human flesh and couldn't find another volunteer...
A curious absence of Jews on this list.
ReplyGiven that the list has only 5 slots, and Jews are less than 1% of the worldwide population, why would you expect them to be represented here?
How is #1 Issei Sagawa a serial killer if he only killed one person?
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesI'm gonna guess because he's treated like a celebrity.
He's not and neither is that Swedish guy. You have to kill one or more people on three or more separate occasions with a "cooling off" period in between in order to be considered a serial killer. Still sick fucks, but not really Serial Murderers.
Because with Cracked, the writer of the article isn't the same guy who came up with the title.
So..how is a man that ate one woman more sadistic than a man that sate 50 to 100? I don't get it. They're both terrible, don't get me wrong..I just don't know that I agree with the numbering. Regardless, these people are why I'm a huge fan of corporal punishment.
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies*ate
Dangit.
I think it has to be the fact that he is now a celebrity, and is treated as such. Where is the line between natural (albeit morbid) curiosity and social tolerance of truly heinous acts? I guess in the eyes of the public, the entertainment value he offers outweighs his being an evil f**k, which I believe is infinitely more frightening than his body count.
Do... you mean capital punishment? Corporal punishment would mean you're a fan of giving them a spanking for murder.
Karla Homolka didn't have her change of name denied . Last time Canada heard , she was Karla Ann Teale or something along those lines . As for her living in the Antilles , that's what we were told although it was basically an unconfirmed rumor . We're pretty sure she's back in Canuckistan these days .
ReplyOh , and the reason she'll never get a day of peace as long as anybody knows who she is and where she lives is because she claimed the usual B.S. excuse women use when nailed for doing something evil ; "Poor me ! I was a smiling , laughing , happy prisoner !" We know because the witch and her scum-on-snot husband were dumb enough to actually record the whole thing . She just forgot to mention these tapes to us BEFORE she made her deal with the court.
I thumbs downed your comment just for the "Canuckistan".
She doesn't deserve a day of peace. Anyone who has seen the video tapes of their crimes agrees she appears completely complicit. Not to mention the fact that the only reason she got a plea bargain was because of a lack of physical evidence and they felt putting Paul away was more important given what they had to work with then they find out the defense attorney illegally withheld information about the location of the tapes.
She is lucky the plea bargain did go through, I cannot imagine a jury excusing her based on the battered wife BS once they heard she gave her drugged, underage sister as a Christmas present to Paul because he blamed her for not being a virgin when they met.
Drives me batty that there are things like the movie "Karla" that show her in a sympathetic light. I was only 8 when all this happened and I still very clearly remember how much fear it caused. As large as Canada is, crimes like these are still very uncommon and "Bernardo" has basically become a synonym for evil in Canada, even to this day.
Probably been mentioned a half dozen times but if there are any real-life Dexter Morgan's out there, you have your targets!
ReplyWhat kind of sick freak would actually want that monster from number 1 appearing on their shows!? Shove him in an insane asylum, or kill him, one or the other he needs to be gotten rid of.
ReplyIf you follow the link, you'll see he shot ads for meat restaurants there. I'm not joking.
japan! wtf??
ReplyAnd these are just the ones who were caught.
ReplyOnly in Japan could this guy live the way he does. I'm still convinced the Japanese are the sickest people on the planet. As far as Pedro Lopez, that story is just horrific and mind-blowing. He was actually originally caught by some tribal leaders in a remote area of South America when he began his killing, but the leaders were persuaded by a missionary to turn him over the local police instead of just killing him. That's when they turned him loose and he went on to kill a couple hundred more little girls.
Reply Hide All See All 8 RepliesTread lightly there Stophjs, that's still racism.
Not saying I don't agree with you, but I blame their government; not the common people.
Yeah, having two f*****g ATOMIC BOMBS dropped on your country tends to do that to ya.
Some kind of deformity in his brain due to radiation, perhaps?
the pedro lopez guy, alot of the victims parents apparently hired a crap ton of mobsters, and hitmen to kill the crap out of him.
Just saying, he wouldn't be on a talk show if the people weren't somehow okay with it.
How the F is that racism Saiko? Maybe you need a dictionary.
rac·ism [rey-siz-uhm]
noun
1. a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement
"I'm still convinced the Japanese are the sickest people on the planet."
THAT would be how it's racist, dimbulb. Do you honestly think that there'd be no viewers if that sort of thing made it on the air in America? s**t, the ratings would blow every other reality show out of the water.
@Augginator: Do yourself a favor, Google "Rape of Nanking" if you think the Japanese were just innocent victims in that war.
Actually, just read this: wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_war_crimes