The 10 Commandments of Public Transportation
Turns out Cracked writers don't spend all of their time huddled in a dungeon Googling dick joke fodder. In fact, some of them have secondary talents, far less important to the world than their contributions to our humble Dick-joke-pedia, but worthy of recognition nonetheless. When Dustin Glick isn't bringing you the The 25 Worst Rapper Names of All Time he's self-publishing comics over at Dustinland.com. In his second Saturday Guest column, Dustin takes you through 10 things you must not do when riding the subway or any other form of public transportation.
For many more of Dustin's comics head over to Dustinland.com.
All of them happens to me pretty much everytime I go on the London underground
ReplyI think they need to add one:
ReplyWhen sitting on the bus, don't sit on the outside seat so no one can sit next to you (this goes double for when it's crowded.)
Seriously, screw you to the guys/gals who can't be bothered to move your asses over when you see someone (especially someone elderly) get on the bus.
As much as I hate when people break the 4th and 5th, the one I hate the most is when they break the 3rd commandment.
ReplySeriously, if you're gonna get off the subway/bus last, why you have to be near to the door blocking the way to everybody else? And it's even worse on buses with only 1 door.
And Jesus spake: "There ith nay spoon".
Replyhaha, #10 happened to me once.. when I was buying bus tickets. First time I forgot I had to punch in the p/w for my card so I was too slow, failed the second time (forgot why), got it on 3rd try :p
ReplyI always take up 2 seats, feet up, blasting punk music and only change my seating style if a hot girl needs a seat and that's because I might get a phone number. LOL
Reply[FOREVER ALONE]
thou shalt stay the f**k away from my boobs, or i will murder thou.
ReplyShalt murder thou.
A small price to pay.
Fuckin' A. Times ten. Plus one.
Replythou shalt keep thy feet off the seat, regardless of the weather or how new thy shoes are.
ReplyThou shalt not attempt frotteurism.
Replythou shalt not take middle seat when others are availible*
ReplyThough shall not give me the stink eye to give up my seat.
ReplyI was here first get over it. Like 80% of the time I'll give it up sometimes I'm just tired or I walked so much in the past week that I feel as if my blisters pops and are bleeding into my shoes. Twice I've had pregnant bitches pop off that I wasn't giving up my seat. There are plenty of other people here that can give up their seat just as well. Plus its not my fault your pregnant so piss off.
I really hope one day a pregnant woman breaks water right on top of you.Thats what you deserve ,you classless bastard.
Maybe you should invest in a car then because last time I checked you only pay for one seat not the entire bus or train
3 and 5 are the worst, 1 gets kinda annoying. And a sort of extension of 2 where a group of people together will spread out and each take up 1 2-seat block, not covering both seats, but people just really don't want to sit next to someone for some reason.
ReplyThe bonus commandment was the most important one in my opinion, it pisses me off so badly when small children do that
ReplyThe funny thing is that most of those are actual rules at DC Metro stations.
ReplyYou know, I can appreciate a badly-drawn comic of it's witty or funny or even slightly amusing. Thank you for providing that link, I shall carefully avoid it.
ReplyIsn't this artist the same guy, the EXACT SAME GUY, who does "Rex in the City" for MAD Magazine? Someone want to help me out here?
ReplyAs a regular bus-goer, this cracks me up. Also, I might add a couple more:
Reply1. "Thou shalt not smoke while waiting for the bus... which they are currently sitting in to leave the station."
2. "Thou shalt not allow their children to scream more than 3 times in a row before telling them to knock it off."
3. "Thou shalt not antagonize the driver, especially as he/she has the power to stop the damned bus any time he pleases to chuck you out."
4. "And last but not least, under penalty of an angry badger to the face, thou shalt not smack their gum in another passenger's ear. EVER."
Number 2 on your list is listed as a bonus commandment, look at the small print underneath the comic.
Bahahaha angry badger to the face.
One more commandment for busses
Replydon`t cut people`s heads off
not that funny...a rare miss
Reply