Magazine Sex And Relationship Tips That Are Just So Stupid
Apparently doing the deed and paying your bills go together like peas and carrots.
![Magazine Sex And Relationship Tips That Are Just So Stupid](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/2/4/8/629248.jpg?v=2)
There are two places human beings should never, ever take sex points from: pornography and magazines. And, more often than not, the stuff magazines recommend is way worse than what you see in the darker corners of the internet.
For example ...
![COSMOPOLITAN invites you to grab a fork and press it against his butt cheeks, his pecs, his thighs and any other part of his body you wish to pleasure](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/9/4/628894.jpg?v=2)
![marie claire urges you to try THE SEXY MARIONETTE Stand facing a wall, as if you're about to be strip-searched, placing both hands slightly above y](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/9/3/628893.jpg?v=2)
![Magazine Sex And Relationship Tips That Are Just So Stupid](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/9/2/628892.gif?v=2)
![Cosmopolitan suggests that women use their breasts as brushes to cover their partner with edible paint, then lick it off afterwards.](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/9/1/628891.jpg?v=2)
![TO SPICE THINGS UP IN THE BEDROOM, CRACKED.cOM COSMOPOLITAN RECOMMENDS HIDING SOMEONE IN YOUR CLOSET WITHOUT THE KNOWLEDGE OF YOUR LOVER BEFORE HAVING](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/9/0/628890.jpg?v=2)
![MAXIM says Remember that chores around the house count as foreplay. Because you should only help clean if it means getting your willy wet.](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/9/628889.jpg?v=2)
![Cosmopolitan recommends eating cookies while you're having seX. They suggest eating them off your partner's breasts, eating them from your partner's m](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/8/628888.jpg?v=2)
![LOOKING FOR A UNIQUE PLACE TO DO THE DEED? HOW ABOUT A BANK VAULT? Men's Health proposes: A safe-deposit-box room is quiet, the door is locked, and t](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/7/628887.jpg?v=2)
![Redbook advises women to excite their partner by touching his armpits. He may not like it, but the only way to find out is by caressing and slapping t](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/6/628886.jpg?v=2)
![CRACKEDCOM, Glamour has some killer tips on how to spice up kissing: Treat his toes like a mouth and make out with them. And... French his anus; not d](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/5/628885.jpg?v=2)
![COSMOPOLITAN WANTS YOU TO TRY EATING AN ICE POP WHILE GIVING HIM ORAL TO DELIVER A MORE PLEASURABLE EXPERIENCE, THOUGH YOU'LL PROBABLY HAVE TO CLEAN U](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/4/628884.jpg?v=2)
![Honey, I'd like YOU to meet--oOooohh! According to Cosmopolitan, women should try surprising their husband with oral when he walks in the front door,](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/3/628883.jpg?v=2)
![Magazine Sex And Relationship Tips That Are Just So Stupid](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/2/628882.jpg?v=2)
![Cosmo SaYs pretend you're his boss and to ask him to stay after work to help with a special task. Because nothing is sexier than being reminded of](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/1/628881.jpg?v=2)
![Cosmopolitan Challenges you to slip a donut around your partner's penis and eat it off. A donut sprinkled with pubic hair and ball sweat sounds irresi](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/8/0/628880.jpg?v=2)
![CRACKEDOON AS forepiay, sexologist Dr. rRachael ROSS suggests in Esquire, Buy her something. Women like gifts. Gifts come, sex follows. Thank you,](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/9/628879.jpg?v=2)
![COSMOPOLITAN Want to give your man the best handjob ever? Wrap his silk tie around his penis and jerk him off! Nothing turns a man on more than having](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/8/628878.jpg?v=2)
![Men'sHealth suggests chilling a bunch of grapes and trailing them along a woman's nipples and inner thighs, and then holding one between your teeth an](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/7/628877.jpg?v=2)
![COSMOPOLITAN IA PRESENTS GRan THE SEXY SPRINKLER Chkis Do downward facing dog overa sprinkler during sex to combine the naughty thrill of outdoor sex](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/6/628876.jpg?v=2)
![REDBOOK RecomMENDS using A 0 ORACKEDCOM WHILE PERFORmING ORAL sex on A man. STEP1 HOLLOWOUT cenTeR STEP2: PLACE AROUND man's penis STEP3: THINK OF BLO](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/5/628875.jpg?v=2)
![Women's Health offers sex tips for multitasking. Activities you can enjoy while having sex: watching TV O answering emails O texting O gift-wrapping c](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/4/628874.jpg?v=2)
![GQ says if you want to keep the spark alive, you should make your girlfriend think that you're cheating on her. Then... SURPRSlI You were just taking](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/pictofact/8/7/3/628873.jpg?v=2)