12 Real News Stories, Adjusted By Us For Insanity (3/4)

Finding honesty in the news is like discovering aliens are real: You knew they were there all along, but the price for the truth is a sore butt.
But luckily for you, our readers have taken this week's popular headlines and stripped them of all the bullshit so you can quickly digest all the important stuff, and never have to worry about not being able to sit down for the next few days.
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