The Man Who Was Killed By His Own Beard

A 16th-century Dutch mayor named Hans Staininger had the most magnificent face full of whiskers the world had ever seen — a hirsute magnificence that ultimately proved to be his undoing

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14 'Real' Headlines The Media's Too Afraid To Write (2/19)

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14 'Real' Headlines The Media's Too Afraid To Write (2/19)

The news these days is pretty much like Napoleon Dynamite's uncle Rico -- full of shit, bad ideas, and is kind of depressing. And, yeah, it probably has a mustache, because why not?

Luckily for you, our readers have taken this week's popular headlines and stripped them of all the bullshit so you can quickly digest all the important stuff, and spend as little time with a sad, creepy uncle as possible.

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