Not everything needs a good scouring.
It's generally an ER situation when your organs start shrieking, so that's where she went. "It was embarrassing, but when they asked me what I had eaten recently, I said a sponge, and they looked dumbfounded," she remembers. "I had to get a stomach pump and get some fluids in me. The problem was that the sponges soaked up some of the acid in my stomach and caused a blockage, because even though I chewed, each piece was too big, and they expanded inside."
She admits to still eating sponges, but only in "small amounts."
Though we suspect that's still above the recommended daily intake of "Inedible foam bacteria magnet."
Evan is dealing with some more lasting damage. His favorite snack is dirt, and as a result, "my teeth are terrible. Eating dirt for over 20 years weather-stripped the enamel off some of them. I've eaten less dirt over time, but it still happened."
If you think your dentist is judgmental, try going in with literal dirt clogging your gum line.