4

What Street View Covers Is Up To The Whims Of The Driver

Google Maps

Street View's maps are pretty comprehensive -- from the inner-city to suburbs to your own butthole after that one time you caught the car driving up with enough time to drop your jorts. But there are some holes in the map, and Adam explains why: "We were told to go from one point to another and hit any important landmarks on the way. Most days I had to start from my apartment or the hotel I was at and go to the next point. You have a quota you need to meet, and many days I would simply do a straight shot and meet that easily enough. Other days I would come in under and would spend the day driving around small developments or up rarely used roads to fill that quota. There were a few large-ish cities I had to pass through (except for the major road that passes through it) to get to some places on quota, while some tiny towns I mapped extensively because I needed that much data."

Take Wheeling, West Virginia. It's one of the largest cities in West Virginia, is a county seat, is home to the HQs of many businesses, and is an all-around regional hub. And yet almost none of it is covered:

Google Maps

Google Maps
Probably 'cause most people travel by boat.

3

Flipping Off The Camera Is Actually A Huge Problem

Google Maps

Contrary to the testimony of your very own butthole, not every rebellious act is hilarious:

"Look on any Google Maps and you'll see a pattern when the car passes by a person on the street," Adam says. "Shot 1: Recognition. Shot 2: Contemplation. Shot 3: ... middle finger."

Google Maps
Like so.

2

You May Get Attacked By Maniacs

David Ramos/Getty Images

Hot Topic tough guy antics weren't the worst things Adam had to deal with. "The worst were the people who saw this as the biggest invasion of privacy ever," he says. "It didn't happen all that much, but it wasn't exactly rare either. If I was at a red light, I would see people wave their arms at me. It wasn't always in excitement. Some were trying to flag me down to tell me about the displeasure of being photographed. This is a huge issue with many homeowners (including Mark Zuckerberg's street) and even entire towns have gotten, or have tried to stop, Google from taking Street Map images there. Hell, Germany has been battling tooth and nail to stop them."

For his own safety, and to avoid those inevitable long, raving lectures about Orwell and America and Reptites in the White House or whatever, Adam figured out a strategy: "Just smile and gun it as soon as the light turned green."

Runner1928/Wiki Commons
And let's just say these babies aren't exactly Maseratis.

Of course, some weren't so easily dissuaded: "There was a rural area where I had to wait at a slow/stop sign construction project on a road. This guy at a house I was passing ran into his SUV, pulled out, and started to follow a few cars behind me. It was hard to forget since he had a huge 'Don't tread on me' flag sticker on his front bumper that peeked out every time he attempted to pass the car in front of him. This was for five miles until we hit a light. He pulled in the turn lane next to me and started yelling something. I knew I shouldn't get into an argument, but I lowered my window in case there was something wrong with my car. He started to yell at me about leaving his house alone because of privacy. I did my customary smile and nod and continued on. He followed me for another mile before giving up."

1

Google Doesn't Tell You You're Disposable

Kowloonese/Wiki Commons

Adam filled in the region they'd set aside for him and waited for his next assignment. "But it didn't happen. Out of the blue, they told me my area was complete and I was told to bring the car [in] for the next person to pick up. And that was it. I had no warning," he says. "I called about offering to go to other places, but that led to a larger problem. For each area you want to work in you need to apply. They don't just transfer you, and I didn't know this. I was told that to work in neighboring regions I would have needed to apply a few months ago -- but no one told me and they didn't even suggest it. I've only talked with one other driver, but the same happened to her: She loved doing it but had to suddenly give her car to someone else in another region -- a job which she was happy to take but didn't know she had to reapply for."

DanielBendjy/iStock
If only they had some service to easily send that info to their drivers ...

So your average Google driver can expect to lose their job juuuust as they're starting to get good at it: "It really is a good job, but it's a job you can only have once. From what I've seen, they did everything they can to make sure of that. If you're not from New York or Philly or another really big city that needs to be constantly updated (and always needs knowledgeable drivers), it's a one-time-only temp job."

So if you need a job, if no one else will give you one -- and if you can find them -- maybe you can get hired by the G-Team.

Evan V. Symon is a Personal Experience interviewer, writer, and interview finder guy for Cracked. Have an awesome job/experience you would like to share? Hit us up at tips@cracked.com today!

For more insider perspectives, check out 5 Bizarre Things Taxi Drivers Know About You and 5 Awful Realities Of Transporting Human Corpses For A Job.

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