Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real Dominatrix

Sex is like nutrition: The only people who know anything beyond the basic mechanics are the ones who get paid a lot of money to dive into it face-first. Any idiot can figure out how to work a sex, but the deeper reality of what turns people on is rarely as simple as sticking Tab A into Slot B (or C if it's your birthday). To sort out the hows, whats, no seriously whats, and dear god whys, we talked to a dominatrix named Natasha. She told us ...

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5
Parental Issues Are Commonplace

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A man who happens to enjoy a good spanking is often accused of having "mommy issues," and we all try not to think too hard about the weirdness involved in calling a male partner "Daddy." It's not just a cliche. In Natasha's experience, "parental issues" are a very real thing. When it comes to fetishes like wearing diapers and being spanked, "about 85 percent of them have been neglected by their mothers [or] have run in on their mothers having relations with the post office guy, brother-in-law, maid, or Santa, and it fucks them for life," she says. "As I do. I fuck them. In the butt."

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Butt-fuckings from Santa can be arranged, too. Candy canes are involved.

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"Every time I'm having an AB/DL [adult baby/diaper lover] session, they all tell me how they end up that way, and it always starts out with, 'So when I was younger, my mom ...'"

But it can be any combination of trauma/fetish that triggers it: "Whether a tooth was pulled when it wasn't ready, an aunt or uncle had you on their lap for too long, you walked in on sexual acts ... even experiences of younger siblings having their shitty drawings higher on the fridge than yours can spark fantasies that will [make you] want to relive it."

Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real DominatrixRyan McVay/Photodisc/Getty Images
Some people are into ass play. Others are into being mocked for their fucked-up houses and ugly stick figure dogs. It's a wide range.

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These scenarios can often be the most challenging from a creative standpoint, because the clients' requirements are very, very specific: "These fetishizers want a full reenactment of the scene. Sometimes I've been allowed to ad-lib, but most of these men have been doing this for over 10 years and are stuck in their ways."

For example, "One client likes to be put in a diaper, and he likes to pee and sometimes poop on himself. His mother had a short temper and wasn't patient during the potty-training phase. Also, she was very stern with him, so when he'd wet the bed (as any kid under 10 does), he'd get punished and embarrassed in front of his friends and family instead of trying to work out what the root cause for the accidents were. So when we session, I have to embarrass him. I bring in other girls sometimes and I humiliate him as they all laugh, point at him, and push him around. He'd been spanked by his mother when he'd pee or poop, so I spank him. He'd been put in time out, so I put him in a cage. His mother made some remark like he 'must be a dog because they go whenever they want,' so I say that too, and put a collar and leash on him and make him fetch and roll over."

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"Who's a good boy?" *SMACK* "Not you!"

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Sometimes they literally bring mommy into it: "I can't be too detailed with this one, but a client walked in on his mother and maid and saw his mom pinned down, and fuses that scene in his past with a wrestling session," Natasha says. "So when we are wrestling, I have to talk about how strong and beautiful I am, how I've defeated his mother, and how she licked my pussy."

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It's a good thing she's roleplaying as a maid, because it sounds like there's quite a bit of cleanup after.

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Somebody piledriving us into the oblivion while shouting about how our mothers did things to their genitals? That sounds like one of our high school bullying sessions. But change that context just a little bit, and you could wind up with a fetish. It's like every day you roll the dice with your nether bits and hope it doesn't come up diapers.

4
Racism And Sex Get Mixed Up A Lot

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All sorts of complex emotional struggles can get tangled up with your genitals. As a black dominatrix, Natasha has a unique perspective on the ways race in particular gets sexualized. "I've participated in sessions and have had it somehow turn into me being a slave who got her freedom and wants to take it out on the master, while being reminded of how good I cleaned the Big House. I have sessioned with racist cops, racist babies, racist rapists, racist patients (where I play the doctor). I don't stress it because I physically take it out on them when it's my turn, but I've turned down repeat customers."

Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real DominatrixWilson Armistead/George Bourne
It's like she wants to keep reminders of humanity's worst crime to an absolute minimum.

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Now, Natasha has the power to end a session at any time, but sometimes it catches her off-guard. Man, surprise racism is the worst kind of racism. "[There was a] guy who has a fetish of owning women, and I was submissive in that session. So I'm keeled over his lap and he's asking me whether I'm a cooking slave or a cleaning slave. I was so shocked that I burped," she says. "But he kept spanking me until I answered. I told him I do both, but he didn't like that answer and whipped me some more and told me about the auction he got me from."

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So ... you're not allowed to complain about difficult customers at your job anymore.

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3
And Now, For The Fluids

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During one of Natasha's sessions, "a man stuck his finger in my butthole and pulled a 'nugget' out and ate it. That was actually the second most nauseating experience I've had at the dungeon. The thing that got me wasn't the moaning and the intensity of him eating it -- it was the direct eye contact that he gave me. He didn't blink. It was like he was eating Cheetos residue off of his fingers. He's a great guy, though." Just needs an Altoid now and then.

Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real DominatrixJason Iannone
As far as which is healthier to eat, that's a total coin toss.

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Whoa, don't check out now. There's a lot more butt stuff incoming. "I can make a client ejaculate through penetration in less than 10 minutes," Natasha proudly proclaims. And nobody becomes an expert colon puncher without a few bumps in the road. "Sometimes men want a police baton (the racist suspect session) or a baseball bat (replay of a hazing he went through), and there will be blood. And poop. I have dealt with sessions of men whom I am convinced eat Taco-Bell-flavored street hot dogs on their way to the dungeon, and I have burnt clothes and showered in bleach."

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When a client forgets to mention his explosive diarrhea until it's too late.

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Luckily, Natasha gets to turn the tables now and again: "Gold showers, ruby showers, brown showers -- daily life. I've pooped on clients and have made them eat it. There's this guy who holds a competition with four or five girls to see who can make him drink the most pee, and he tips the LOSERS $100, so I drank so much water over the course of the hour that it took for him to arrive. It felt like the equivalent of UTI, but I won."

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And that's all that matters, isn't it?

2
The Masochism Stuff Gets Pretty Hardcore

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Natasha's clients want to orgasm all the way to the hospital. She remembers how in her very first session, "this guy wanted me to cane him. Cool, right? But he wanted me to cane him until he bled ... I kept watching to see if he was getting faint, and he just kept asking me to go harder ... I swear he got stitches when I finished with him."

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A mistress needs a firm hand ... and a strong stomach.

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"The most nauseating experience was with a customer who wanted sounds done," Natasha remembers. "For those of you who do not know what sounds are, they're long metal rods that are meant to dilate passages." Oh, let's not get clinical now. We're talking about shoving metal rods into a dick-hole.

Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real DominatrixCitizen / Wiki Commons
The only sounds we're making are whimpers.

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So: "This guy wanted to have some passages dilated, and wanted to use every single size that came in the set. There are many different types of sounds, and some can be up to a foot long. So once he was prepped and the sounds were lubed, the insertion began. After the second-to-last one came out, we saw the blood. He believed in going hard or going home, so we got to the last one ... so I'm at the last sound -- basically plastic hanger or AAA battery status -- and there's more blood coming out mixed with the lube, and it's making my stomach turn. The part that put me over was pretending to enjoy making him jerk off into his own mouth and watching him eat his blood-infused sploosh. I didn't eat for two days after that."

Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real DominatrixLead Holder / Wiki Commons
Presumably, once a client demands a D-battery, Natasha goes home. And never, ever leaves again.

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Holy shit. We, uh ... we may be able to beat that record.

The not-eating thing! Not the sounding thing.

God, no.

1
Butt Stuff Can Ruin Lives

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The typical relationship trajectory of Natasha's rectally-inclined clients tends to go something like this: "They get married and ... are either too ashamed to tell their wives, or have tried but [their wives] can't or won't fulfill their desires." So they "choose to lurk in the night (or during lunchtime) to purge some of the sexual pressure that's built up."

Since Natasha's services aren't cheap, their lives are eventually consumed by the frantic shredding of credit card bills, and the stress inevitably takes its toll. "Saying two-thirds of them are divorced is probably an underestimated guess ... Being single means they don't have to explain their finances to anyone."

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"I paid for the divorce lawyer with the money I saved not having to hire bulk shredding services anymore."

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It's a sad life, but luckily, Natasha is there at the ready with lube and sympathy. "When a client tells me that it's his first time at a dungeon, or he's been visiting dungeons for 20 years, because he has not had luck with finding someone who can put something in his butt, that means he's been denied and looked at with disgust," she laments. "I can see it on their faces a lot of the time. It's really sad."

Sex workers: Doing the weird stuff so you don't have to since always.

Manna does completely different weird stuff on Twitter.

For more insider perspectives, check out No Fat Tourists: 5 Rules Of Life As A Prostitute In Vietnam and 6 Realities Of Life When Your Fetish Is EXTREMELY Weird.

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