Gladstone has been a columnist here since forever. His forthcoming novel, Notes from the Internet Apocalypse, published by Thomas Dunne, will be available for purchase in early 2014.
Come with me as I seek the most accurate definition for this thing that makes the world go round. Spoiler alert: A thing that makes the world go round is a bad definition for love.
A good story requires more than just a talented tale-telling; it needs a good audience. And that's harder to find than you might think, because there are so many people who suck at hearing stories.
Life is hard and filled with failure. Think of it as a raging erection, but replace the forthcoming ejaculant with failure. Did that help? Somehow I don't think that helped.
Throughout history there have been quick-thinking folks who were given the perfect setup and defended themselves with a punchline of just a few well-chosen words.
The next time you have a dead body, whether it be something you hunted, purchased, or even once loved, why not let one of these meat puppet maestros work their magic?
I was no longer a long-haired teen. True, the passing years had brought me a lifetime of accomplishments and hard-earned sexual competence, but could I rock. Here is my night. You tell me who the rock star is.
Even though I like bars, they are not all the same. They come in all shapes and sizes, and our young, impressionable readers need a sexy older man with a misspent life to shepherd them
You can be a huge success and not be smart, just as you can be an incredibly gifted failure. For every Ke$ha, there are a thousand girls blowing their wood shop teacher for a passing grade so they can cut class who never amount to anything.
It turns out that some artists are just putting forth a certain sound with the instrument they have been given without any mastery or understanding of how it got there.
