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Real Name: Ryan Menezes
Member Since: September 24th, 2012
Ryan Menezes has written over 1,000 articles, totaling over a million words, attracting over 130 million views and containing over 12 jokes. He broke down and set up a Twitter page, just for his Cracked fans, at https://twitter.com/MenezesCracked. You can also try reaching out to him through firstname.lastname@example.org.
Ah yes, it’s the Ken rule. We made that because of Ken
Wait, no. Don’t stick that there!
In some places, the ground itself will poison you
Welcome to the past, when we bounced words off the Moon
We’ve got some fine things to say about New Jersey
If you ain’t no punk, holla, ‘We want prenup. We want prenup, yeah!’
‘I will watch porn and give out free cheese, or by God, I will sue you!’
That’s not a feminist message. That’s just one factory saying, ‘Keep working, peons’
Smell that grass? That grass is screaming
Maybe that naked cult leader doesn’t have your best interests at heart
Our mission here is to scour history for the single Weirdest Life Anyone Has Ever Lived.
Real hostage situations get way crazier than you think.
The way these debates are held today renders them almost completely pointless.
Well, these are some weird shenanigans.
The smallest changes in these men's lives would have changed all of history.
Change happens fast ... except when it doesn't.
Companies use two methods when hiring. Both are terrible.
The US Navy filed a patent for an aircraft that can 'engineer the fabric of our reality.'
It's easy to work the system and win these awards even if you don't deserve them.
Surprisingly, the kidnappers often end up hurt themselves.
We like to think we run the planet, with our higher intelligence and penchant for being pretty innovative at warfare. But a hard glance at the animal kingdom gives us pause.
Hollywood lied to us. And so did the history books.
Warning: A fair chunk of this list comes from Cosmo.
You can probably think of a a few people you'd never forgive. But the following people were a lot better at forgiving than you are.
If you're anything like us, you've watched the world burn. Not on purpose, mind you, but because you've become an expert in destroying city blocks while trying to bake a pan of brownies.
People are constantly thinking of the children. Maybe thinking a little too hard, and objecting too hard.
Sometimes, science sounds like utter madness.
Shortcuts to becoming a more competent person
Feast your eyes on the following! (Warning: May contain some actual eye feasting.)
If you're having a hard time with this whole living thing, we're here to help.