My Expert Scientific Analysis
Hunting Carmen all by my lonesome was a stupid idea, only successful because the game literally wouldn't let me lose. Googling should have been my friend all along -- shit, even real detectives use it, since the point is to get the job done using every resource possible. Lesson learned: From now on, I will embrace my lack of memory, task the computer with reminding me of goofy, trivial crap, and focus all my natural brain power on what actually matters in life.
Like that soup I've had on high for ... 15 hours?! Shit, gotta go.
Jason doesn't need a home anyway -- he's got Facebook and Twitter. Squat with him there.
Carmen Sandiego might be a tough game online, but the TV show was hilariously impossible. See small children compete in physics-defying physical challenges in The 5 Most Ridiculously Unfair Kids' Game Shows, and learn why an octopus could outwit Carmen Sandiego in no time when you read 6 Animals With Better Memories Than You.
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